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ADHD Parenting Hacks: What Actually Works? Tips for Parents in the Netherlands
24 oktober 2026 · 36 min
ADHD parenting hacks: what actually works when you're already overwhelmed? Lees meer
If you have ADHD and you're raising kids, you probably don't need another person telling you to wake up at 5 a.m., buy a planner or just be more disciplined.
You need things that actually work for your brain.
In this ADHD Awareness Month episode of DAM Parenting, Eva sits down with Liam from Dads do Art, for an honest, funny and very real conversation about parenting with ADHD. Between them, they've tried the planners, timers, routines and productivity tricks. Some help. Others end up in the ADHD hack graveyard.
So they're putting the popular ADHD hacks to the test, giving them honest scores out of ten and talking about what it's really like to use them while raising young children.
In this episode, we talk about:
Why planners, time blocking and endless phone reminders don't always work.
Preparing for the school morning
Habit stacking and making boring tasks a little easier to start.
Visual timers
Dopamine snacks
Body doubling:
Sensory kit
Sleep, emotional regulation, ADHD paralysis and the pressure to be a more disciplined parent.
But this conversation is about more than lunchboxes, forgotten appointments and getting everyone out of the door.
It's also about the shame that comes with feeling as though you should be able to do things that seem easy for everyone else. It's about understanding your own brain, finding the support that works for you, and learning that being kinder to yourself is not the same as giving up.
Because ADHD is not one-size-fits-all. A hack that transforms one person's morning might become another person's abandoned purchase. The goal isn't to become a perfectly organised parent. It's to build the support and systems that make your own life a little easier.
Parenting with ADHD in the Netherlands?
Whether you're raising children in Amsterdam, Utrecht, Rotterdam, Haarlem or elsewhere in the Netherlands, doing family life far from your original support n…
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Late ADHD Diagnosis Grief: Why Relief Feels Like Loss
21 oktober 2026 · 33 min
You finally got the ADHD diagnosis. So why do you feel wrecked? Lees meer
DAM Trauma, episode 4, for ADHD Awareness Month. Trauma therapist Adina Petre, who was diagnosed late herself, on the grief nobody warns you about: rereading old school reports, the anger at the people who missed it, the shame that decades of being called lazy leaves behind, and finding out about yourself because your child was assessed first. Plus the first thing she works on when a newly diagnosed client walks in.
Guest: Adina Petre, trauma therapist based in Amsterdam working with international clients.
This episode is not a diagnosis or medical advice. If it brings up more than a podcast can hold, talk to your huisarts or a therapist.
Get the monthly newsletter: https://damparenting.subscribepage.io
More on this topic: https://damparenting.nl/
late ADHD diagnosis · adult ADHD diagnosis · ADHD grief · diagnosed with ADHD as an adult · ADHD in women · ADHD shame · ADHD and trauma · parent with ADHD · child diagnosed first · neurodivergent parent · ADHD in the Netherlands · parenting in the Netherlands
#ADHD #LateDiagnosis #DAMTrauma
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Breast Cancer Support in the Netherlands: Help in English
19 oktober 2026 · 29 min
Cancer Support in the Netherlands: Help in English Lees meer
Where can you find English-speaking cancer support in the Netherlands? A cancer diagnosis is difficult anywhere — but navigating treatment, family life and an unfamiliar healthcare system far from home can make it even harder.
In this conversation, Katherine, founder of Cancer Support Netherlands, shares her experience as a two-time breast cancer survivor, a mother of two and an international resident who turned her own need for support into a community.
We talk about receiving a cancer diagnosis abroad, trusting your instincts when something doesn’t feel right, explaining cancer to your children, supporting a partner through illness, and finding people who understand what you’re going through. What began with a Facebook post asking for a cup of tea grew into English-language peer support for people affected by cancer.
Cancer Support Netherlands is a Dutch nonprofit offering English-language peer support to people living with cancer, survivors, partners, family members and carers.
Find support: https://cancersupportnetherlands.nl
Instagram: @cancer_netherlands📩 Get the DAM Parenting monthly newsletter: https://damparenting.subscribepage.io
🌍 Explore more resources for international families in the Netherlands: https://damparenting.nlYou are seen. You are not alone.
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Miscarriage in the Netherlands: Pregnancy Loss, Grief & What Actually Helps
15 oktober 2026 · 25 min
TW: this episode talks about miscarriage and pregnancy loss. Skip it if today isn't the day. It will be here. Lees meer
Released on Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day 15 October 2026, this episode is for anyone who has lost a pregnancy or a baby while living in the Netherlands, and for anyone supporting someone who has.
Melissa, an American living in Rotterdam, went through three pregnancy losses in the Dutch system before having her two children. She talks honestly about a missed miscarriage at her first midwife (verloskundige) appointment, deciding between medical management and a D&C (curettage), a second loss alone during Covid, a termination for medical reasons, and a near-sepsis emergency at Erasmus MC.
We cover:
Going through miscarriage as an expat, in a second language and an unfamiliar healthcare system
Why grief after early pregnancy loss is normal, and why it can last months
What to say (and not say) to a friend after a miscarriage
Sibyl, the app Melissa built for pregnancy loss support
Sibyl is a private companion app for pregnancy loss, built from lived experience with gynaecologists, fertility specialists and a reproductive mental health psychologist. It's for any kind of loss, from failed fertility treatment to stillbirth, whether it happened yesterday or months ago.
OFFER: One month free with code DAM2026
Website: https://www.sibyl.care
App Store: https://apps.apple.com/app/id6787125952
Instagram: @sibyl_app
Support in the Netherlands: your huisarts (GP) or verloskundige can refer you to a psychologist, including English-speaking ones.
If you're here for someone else, send this to them, or just message them that you're thinking of them.
Get DAM Parenting in your inbox once a month: SUBSCRIBE HERE
Follow: @damparentingpodcast · damparenting.nl
DAM Parenting is an English-language podcast for international and expat parents in the Netherlands. We arrived without a village, but we built one anyway. The village is for the hard days too.
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Is It ADHD or Just Adjusting? Spotting ADHD in our Third Culture Kids
14 oktober 2026 · 40 min
Is it ADHD, or is your child just exhausted from a new school, a new language and a new country? Lees meer
It's #ADHDAwarenessMonth. Child psychologist Kate Berger from the Expat Kids Club on why some kids hold it together all day and fall apart at the front door, what a Dutch teacher really means by "druk", and how to get from a first worry to an assessment. Plus the one thing she says parents nearly always know first.
Guest: Kate Berger, child psychologist and founder of The Expat Kids Club, supporting families in the Netherlands for over 18 years.
Mentioned on the episode: -https://www.amsterdam.nl/en/health-care-support/personal-budget/
- Tilt Parenting
-The Expat Kids Club provides psychoeducational assessments and screenings for many neurodevelopment conditions, including ADHD and ASD. We do not formally diagnose, but use standardised assessment measures that yield information to provide reports that include diagnostic indication (if relevant), as well as tailored recommendations for access to academic accommodations (aligned with IB-standards), and additional (mental) health services in supports in NL and abroad. We also, of course, offer therapeutic intervention. For more information about our services please see expatkidsclub.com
Get the monthly newsletter: HERE
More on this topic: https://damparenting.nl/
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ADHD and Sex: Why 'Not Tonight' Feels Like Rejection
7 oktober 2026 · 28 min
Does ADHD affect your sex life? If you or your partner has ADHD, "not tonight" can land like a door slamming, and nobody has told either of you why. Lees meer
It's ADHD Awareness Month, and DAM ex goes there. Sex and intimacy counsellor Debby Poort explains why the intense early spark shifts, what rejection sensitivity does in the bedroom, and why so many couples end up feeling more like parent and child than partners. Plus the medication conversation almost nobody has with their doctor.
For the partner with ADHD and the one who loves them. Neither of you is the problem.
Guest: Debby Poort, sex and intimacy counsellor at Yellow Wood.
Her free welcome course: sexandintimacycounseling.nl.
Get the monthly newsletter HERE
More on this topic on DAMParenting.nl
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ADHD Awareness Month: (Recorded Nine Hours Before It Airing)
1 oktober 2026 · 10 min
Kicking off ADHD Awareness Month with the least polished episode I've ever made. Recorded nine hours before it went out, at my kitchen table, in one take. The deadline is the only thing that has ever made me do anything. Lees meer
I was diagnosed in my forties — the same month this podcast launched. Three medications in three months, none of which worked, and then I was told I'd maxed out my dose. And what I felt wasn't "the system failed me." It was "I've failed. Again."
In this one:
– What a late ADHD diagnosis actually feels like as a parent
– Why ADHD medication not working can feel like a personal failure
– New University of Warwick research linking ADHD to gut problems, IBS and constipation
– Why calling it a deficit of attention was always a con — it's regulation, not concentration
– Why neurodivergent mothers burn out more than everyone else
– And why "just rest" is the most useless advice ever given to a working parentAll of October is ADHD on DAM Parenting — for you, your partner, your kids. Debby on sex and intimacy when your brain won't settle. Adina on the grief nobody warns you about after a late diagnosis. Kate on raising neurodivergent children here. Mimi on languages. And Liam and me on a Saturday, going through everything we've tried that didn't work.
New here? There are 200+ episodes, all sorted by theme at damparenting.nl
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🎧 Last month's episode on regulation with Adina Petre -
My Child Understands My Language but Only Answers in Dutch
30 september 2026 · 29 min
Your child understands every word of your home language, and answers you in Dutch. Every time. If it started when school or daycare went back, you're not imagining it. Lees meer
Why does my bilingual child only answer in Dutch? Mimi from Growing Up Multilingual explains why the school language takes over so fast, whether you should insist on a reply in your language, and why she'd retire one very popular piece of bilingual parenting advice.
We also get into the child who seems embarrassed by the home language, one easy thing to try this week, and what to do if you feel you've already lost ground.
For international parents raising bilingual and multilingual children in the Netherlands, where Dutch at school can quickly become Dutch at home too.
Get the free Multilingual Cheat Sheet when you join the DAM Parenting newsletter
Check out our website: damparenting.nl
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Taalparade: A Free Multilingual Family Event in Amstelveen on 7 November
28 september 2026 · 17 min
The Dutch and English langauges are everywhere. The language your child speaks with their grandmother? Almost nowhere outside your front door. And kids notice. Lees meer
Mimi joins me for a short one about Taalparade, a free multilingual family day for children aged 0–12. We talk about why seeing your home language out in the world matters more than any lesson about diversity, and why asking a bilingual child to "say something" in their language can backfire.
For international families raising multilingual children in the Netherlands.
Taalparade:
Saturday 7 November,
11:00–16:00,
Library Amstelveen (next to the shopping centre).
It's Free.
Whether your family speaks one language or five, you're invited.
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The Shame of Asking: From the Boardroom to Food Delivery Driver
26 september 2026 · 32 min
Camila moved here for love straight out of university, spent sixteen years climbing at a big media company, and quickly built Joy In Organizing a business with 77,000 followers and a book deal. Then came burnout, a divorce that ate €45,000 in legal fees, and nine months of job applications that went nowhere. Lees meer
This summer she got on a bike with an Uber Eats bag. The reel she made about it has over a million views now.
This episode is about shame. The kind that makes you go quiet instead of asking for help — and what happened the day she messaged every single person she knew, including a man she once rented a bike from.
We talk about carrying a household financially for years, what divorce costs when you have no family in the country, why supermarket and restaurant shifts don't work if you're the only adult in the house, and why she says you should never confuse needing help with failing.
For anyone raising children in a country they didn't grow up in, working a system nobody explained to them, and wondering how they'd survive doing it alone.
Newsletter, once a month: Sign up here
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Can't Relax No Matter What You Try? Nervous System Regulation Explained
23 september 2026 · 1 uur 1 min
Tried breathwork, silent retreats, sound baths and every calming app going, and still can't relax? You're not bad at it. Your nervous system might just need something different. Lees meer
In episode 3 of DAM Trauma, trauma therapist Adina Petre explains nervous system regulation in plain English. No Latin, no diagrams, no pressure.
In this episode:
– What regulation actually means (it isn't feeling calm all the time)
– The window of tolerance, hyperarousal and hypoarousal, for parents running on empty
– Why fight, flight and freeze are automatic, not a willpower problem
– Co-regulation when your support network is a plane ride away
– What constantly adapting to a new country does to your nervous system
– The one thing Adina says doesn't exist at all
– A simple, slightly playful tool you can build tonight from an old shoebox
For international, expat and immigrant parents in the Netherlands dealing with parental burnout, brain fog, the mental load and the everyday stress of raising a family abroad.
If this episode brings up something bigger than a podcast can hold, talk to your huisarts or contact Adina directly.
Adina Petre: Instagram
Get the DAM Parenting newsletter: once a month, plus early access to the last-Wednesday episode.
Find episodes by topic: damparenting.nl
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Living In A Diverse City Isn't Enough | Raising Anti-Racist Kids In The Netherlands
16 september 2026 · 50 min
Living in a diverse city does not teach a child about race. Parents have to do that on purpose. Lees meer
A four-year-old on a playdate in Utrecht told her friend's mother that the girl's dad was scary because he has a brown face. An hour later, outside a supermarket, she asked whether he steals money too. Her parents are not racist.
Maya was born and raised in the Netherlands. Mo is biracial — a Malian father, a French mother, a childhood between Abidjan and Paris, fifteen years in the Netherlands. They are raising a four-year-old daughter here in the Netherlands.
In this episode:
— What to say when a child says something racist, and why you do not have to answer in the moment
— Why blaming the other parents is usually wrong, and what to say to them instead
— How to introduce race to a toddler or preschooler without a formal conversation
— Why the infamous 'Amsterdam's 180 nationalities' do not produce mixed friendship groups
Questions this episode answers:
What age should you start talking to children about race?
Does it make my child racist if they say something racist?
Is living in a multicultural city enough?
This episode is brought to you in partnerhsip with MamaSocial
Subscribe to the monthly newsletter for international parents in the Netherlands: damparenting.subscribepage.io
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The Dutch School Year, Month by Month — A Chat With Liam
12 september 2026 · 52 min
Schools back in session and nobody's ready. The alarms are back, the shoes are missing, and somewhere in your inbox is a school calendar you haven't properly looked at yet. Lees meer
So Eva sat down with Liam — also known as Dad Do Art, self-declared Vulnerable Dad number Two — got the calendar out, and went through the whole Dutch school year. Month by month. Not a masterclass. Two parents, two coffees, and nine months of what's actually coming.
What's in it: studiedagen and why you mark every single one this week, while you're still an optimist. School apps. What happens when there's no substitute teacher, and why the playdate swap isn't the fluffy part of parenting — it's the emergency infrastructure. Herfstvakantie and why you're already late to book. The Sinterklaas intocht, and the small matter of celebrating two men in red who arrive by completely different transport. The long January stretch: darkness, sickness, and lice. The May holiday, which is in April. Keti Koti. And the summer finish line, when everyone gets sick the second they stop.
Plus the things nobody tells you: why the school gates feel awkward and it isn't you, why you should ask a parent — not the teacher — about the class WhatsApp group, and how one Friday afternoon on an empty playground turned into an actual village.
Here's the reframe that started it. There's a US Surgeon General advisory on parental stress that names the mismatch between how work is structured and how children's schedules are structured as a core driver of parental burnout. You're not failing at logistics. The logistics were built by someone who's never met a working parent.
For international parents, expat families, and anyone whose child has just started group 1, 2 or 3 at a Dutch basisschool — whether you're three weeks in or three days in.
Send this to one parent who's just started school, or is about to. Consider that your first volunteer act.
DAM Parenting — helping parents navigate Dutch systems while raising childre…
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Why Your Child Fell Apart in Week Three of School — Transition Fatigue in Expat Kids, with Kate Berger
9 september 2026 · 34 min
📬 Get the monthly email: damparenting.nl — everything from the podcast, in four minutes. Lees meer
Your child went back to school and seemed fine. Then week two happened.
For internationally mobile children, September isn't just a new school year. It's a re-entry. They've come back from a summer in a country that might feel more like home than this one, said goodbye to grandparents again, and walked into a classroom where they have to switch languages at the door. The tiredness doesn't show up on day one. It shows up when the adrenaline runs out.
Kate Berger is a child psychologist and the founder of the Expat Kids Club in Amstelveen and Wassenaar, where she works with internationally mobile children and their families. In this episode we talk about what September actually does to expat and third culture kids — cumulative transition fatigue, the difference between a child who's struggling with school and a child who's struggling with coming back, and why so much of what parents read as behaviour is really exhaustion.
We also get into the thing nobody says out loud: how much of a parent's own anxiety lands on a child at the school gate, and what to do about it when you're anxious for good reasons.
If your child has been more tearful, more clingy or more furious than usual since term started, this one is for you.
In this episode: re-entry after a summer abroad · why week two is harder than week one · transition fatigue and how it accumulates over years · what internationally mobile children lose that nobody names · how parent anxiety transfers at the school gate · what actually helps, and what makes it worse.
Kate Berger runs the Expat Kids Club ( www.expatkidsclub.com — Insttagram @expatkidsclub.)
Part of DAM Parenting's ongoing series on what it actually takes to raise children in a country you didn't grow up in.
New episodes every Wednesday.
www.damparenting.nl
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Mismatched Libido: One Wants Sex To Feel Close, One Needs To Feel Close First | DAMSex
2 september 2026 · 27 min
One of you reaches for sex to feel close. The other needs to feel close before sex is even on the table. Nobody is wrong, nobody is broken, and most couples never say a word of it out loud. Lees meer
In Episode 5 of the DAM Sex series, sex and intimacy counsellor Debby Poort joins DAM to unpack what happens when two people in the same relationship have completely different starting points for desire — and why so much of the disconnection around sex turns out not to be about sex at all.
What we get into:
What responsive desire and spontaneous desire actually mean, and why one of them is so consistently misread as "you don't want me anymore"
Why mismatched libido in a long-term relationship is far more common, and far less personal, than it feels at 11pm
Why a man wanting sex is so often not about what his partner assumes it's about
What happens in new parent couples when one partner is exhausted and touched out for months and the other turns to pornography — and the line Debby draws between when that's neutral and when it's a problem
How to open that conversation at home without it landing as an accusation
Why couples from different countries, families and faiths are working from completely different sexual scripts, and what to do when those scripts contradict each other
What Debby wishes partners understood about arousal, the orgasm gap, and how long things actually take
The one conversation she has in her practice more than any other — and why couples visibly relax the moment they hear it
If you have ever thought "they're never in the mood," or been on the receiving end of "is that all you ever think about," this is the episode.
About Debby Debby Poort is a sex and intimacy counsellor based in the Netherlands, working in English with couples and individuals — including a lot of international and intercultural couples. Find her at yellowwood.nl and sexandintimacycounselling.nl. She also runs a free introductory course you can work through at home, on your own, wi…
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Language Loss vs Reduced Activation: Returning to School in the Netherlands After Summer
26 augustus 2026 · 22 min
The school bag is back out. The new lunch box is ready. And somewhere between the airport and the front door, your child tried to say something in Dutch — and it didn't come as easily as it did before you left. Does that mean something has gone wrong? Did six weeks speaking your home language undo years of work? Lees meer
In this episode of Dam Parenting, Eva sits down with multilingualism specialist Mimi - from Growing Up Multilingual— back for another episode of their ongoing multilingualism series — to talk through one of the most common end-of-summer anxieties in international families: the moment the school language feels rusty.
They cover:
— What is actually happening in your child's brain after weeks in a different linguistic environment
— Why reduced activation is completely different from language loss
— What parents do that makes the transition harder (and what actually helps)
— How to talk to your child about the shift so they understand it
— and stop interpreting it as failure
— When to genuinely worry, and when to simply stay steady
Mimi also addresses younger children, preschoolers, and families whose children are starting school in Dutch for the first time this September — and what they need to know before day one.
This episode is for every multilingual family in the Netherlands returning from the homeland, heading into a new school year, and quietly wondering: are we okay? Yes. You are. And here's why. Dam Parenting is the weekly English-language podcast for international families navigating life in the Netherlands. New episodes every Wednesday.
This episode is brought to you by MamaSocial , because navigating motherhood far from home is so much better with the right women around you. Events and spaces for mothers of all backgrounds, right here in the Netherlands.
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7 Types of Trauma That Show Up When Living Abroad — With Trauma Therapist Adina Petre
19 augustus 2026 · 56 min
You moved here. You built a life. And somewhere along the way, you started carrying something you couldn't quite name. Lees meer
In this episode, clinical psychologist and trauma therapist Adina Petre joins us to break down 7 types of trauma that show up specifically in expat and international family life — the ones that don't look like trauma from the outside, but quietly shape everything.
We cover: relocation grief, cultural identity loss, generational trauma, birth trauma in a foreign healthcare system, parenting without your support network, the psychological cost of living in a second language, and vicarious trauma in a world that won't stop delivering bad news.
This episode won't overwhelm you. It will give you words. And sometimes — that's exactly what's needed.
Share it with someone who needs the language.
Adina Petre: adinapetre.com
Follow us: @damparentingpodcast -
Dutch School Starter Pack: Groep 1, Gym Days, BSO and the Summer Slide
15 augustus 2026 · 23 min
After Wednesdays school lunch episodes, i have recieved several DM's asking for hints and tips about schools - and without asking everyone to go back listeniing to the numerous episodes we already have in our archive - I decided to magpie this episode, and grab a selection of learnings from previous episodes and also add in a few of my own. Lees meer
In the Netherlands children start basisschool the day after their fourth birthday, so your child may walk into a class that's already formed. This episode covers what to expect in groep 1 and 2, what to send them in, and what to do in those first overwhelming weeks — for parents new to the Dutch system and for anyone heading back after the six-week summer holiday.
WHAT'S IN THIS EPISODE
- The Dutch school words nobody translates: groep 1, 2 and 3, kleuters, juf and meester, wennen, BSO, TSO, luizenzak, het tien-uurtje, gymles
- Why gym day means your kleuter may be asked to strip to their underwear
- Clothes, shoes, rain gear and mittens — Isabel Cruz's four practical rules
- Leerplicht: your four-year-old is not legally required to be at school until they turn five, and what that means for half days and BSO
- The summer slide, and why groep 1 and 2 have nothing to catch up on
- What to say at pickup instead of "how was your day"
- What to do when your child says someone was mean to them
QUICK ANSWERS
What is groep 1? The first year of Dutch primary school, for four-year-olds. Groep 1 and 2 run almost entirely on play; formal reading and writing start in groep 3.
What is wennen? Settling-in practice mornings before your child officially starts. Ask your school how many they offer.
What is BSO? Buitenschoolse opvang — after-school care, booked and waitlisted separately from school.
When does school become compulsory? Leerplicht starts at five, from the first school day of the month after your child's fifth birthday.
When do Dutch schools go back? Summer holidays are staggered across three regions, so return dates d…
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What to Put in Your Child's Lunch Box for a Dutch School — With a Children's Nutritionist
12 augustus 2026 · 45 min
What do you actually put in a Dutch school lunch box? Parents at an Amsterdam school sent in 11 photos of their children's real lunch and snack boxes, and children's nutritionist Mélody goes through three of them with us — what's working, what a child's body genuinely needs to get through a school day, and what she'd change. Lees meer
This one is for you whether your child starts school next week starts next month, or next year. We cover what balance actually means across a week rather than in a single box, why the Dutch fruitpauze does more work than parents realise, why the water-only rule at most Dutch schools is a support rather than a restriction, and whether the classic broodje kaas is nutritionally fine. Spoiler: it is.
We also talk about what happens when your food culture doesn't match the Dutch one — warm lunches versus sandwiches — and what to do when your child comes home asking for the same thing everyone else has. Plus three staples for the morning you have five minutes, why children under five shouldn't have nuts, and Melody's three professional permission slips for parents carrying too much already.
All 11 lunch boxes are on our Instagram, @damparentingpodcast. Part of DAM Parenting's August back-to-school series for international and expat families in the Netherlands.
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Why Your Desire Disappeared — And How to Find It Again (With Science)
5 augustus 2026 · 18 min
DAM Parenting says the stuff out loud that you might be thinking — just in your headphones, on your own time, when you're not quite ready to say it to anyone else yet. Lees meer
In episode 4 of DAM Sex, Eva is back with sex and intimacy counsellor Debby Poort to talk about something that doesn't get said enough — and not in the way it usually gets said. Sex is good for you. Not as a favour to your partner. Not because it's been a while. For you. Your sleep. Your cortisol. Your sense of yourself as a person who exists in a body that belongs to you.
They get into the actual science — cardiovascular benefits, dopamine, oxytocin, endorphins, and yes, headaches — and then into the harder question: how do you share that with someone who is depleted, running on empty, and already feeling like everything is a should?
Debby also unpacks responsive desire and the crucial difference between willingness and wanting — including the very real risk of responsive desire being used as pressure, and why that misses the point entirely. They talk about what it takes to reconnect to desire that has genuinely gone quiet — not just low, but offline — and whether it ever really comes back.
Plus: why couples stop touching each other completely, the fear underneath non-sexual touch, the couples who stopped initiating without a single fight about it, and why there is always a reason — even when brain fog means you can't remember what it was.
And Debby shares details of her free welcome course at sexandintimacycounseling.nl — no appointment needed, no commitment, just a place to start.
Find Debby Poort: yellowwood.nl
Got a question for Debby? DM us on Instagram or email damparentingpodcast@gmail.com -
They Couldn't Find the Right School. So They Built One.
1 augustus 2026 · 15 min
What do you do when the school you want for your child simply doesn't exist? If you're Tim and Camilla, co-founders of Seeker — you build it. Lees meer
Seeker is a brand new private bilingual Dutch-English Montessori primary school opening in Eindhoven this September. And the children starting now? They are the founding class — the ones who will set the tone, the culture, and the standard for every child who comes after them.
In this episode, Eva talks to Tim about what was missing in Eindhoven for international families, what it actually takes to open a private school inside the Dutch education system, why the inspectie only shows up after you open your doors, and what it means to ask families to trust something that has no history yet — because it's about to become history.
A short, feel-good summer episode about the audacity of building something from nothing.
Find Seeker at seeker.education
Eindhoven | Bilingual Dutch-English | Montessori | Ages 4–6 | Opening September 2026
Part of Dam Parenting's ongoing series on schools, systems, and raising children in the Netherlands.
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Is My Child's Dutch Getting Worse Over Summer? What Multilingual Families in the Netherlands Need to Know
29 juli 2026 · 28 min
You're away for the six weeks of school holiday in your home country. Maybe you dropped your children off and came back to work. Or you're staring down the new school year starting soon with a child who has barely spoken Dutch all summer — and a quiet worry that something has slipped.This episode is for all of it. Lees meer
Eva sits down with multilingualism specialist Mimi from Growing up Mulltilingual for a wide-ranging conversation about the language anxiety that follows multilingual families through summer — whether that's a child who goes quiet in the home language when they arrive at the grandparents', a child returning to the Netherlands after weeks abroad wondering if their Dutch is still there, or a family heading into September with a child who has barely spoken the school language in months.
They cover what actually happens to language when the environment changes, why reduced activation is completely different from language loss, what the silent period really means, and the BICS versus CALP distinction that reframes what fluency actually looks like in a child.
BICS (Social Language): The conversational language used in casual, face-to-face, or everyday interactions (e.g., chatting on the playground, ordering food). Because it is highly contextualized, learners typically master this within 6 months to 2 years of immersion
CALP (Academic Language): The specialized, context-reduced language required to succeed in classroom subjects and professional settings (e.g., reading textbooks, writing essays, solving math problems). It takes significantly longer to develop—typically 5 to 7 years.
Mimi also has something important to say about the child who compares themselves to monolingual cousins and feels behind — and why that comparison is never a fair one.
For multilingual families in the Netherlands navigating summer, the homeland, and the return to the academic year.
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You're Allowed to Be Exhausted: A Reality Check Before the Summer Holidays
22 juli 2026 · 7 min
Feeling like an exhausted parent before the summer holidays have even started? You're allowed to be. This short, one-take episode — no editing, no polish, on purpose — is a reality check on parent burnout, the mental load, and why holidays with young kids are not actually holidays (they're taking the show on the road). Lees meer
Recorded at the start of the Dutch summer break, this episode gives you permission to rest before you crash — because burnout doesn't send a calendar invite, and the signs of parental exhaustion are easy to miss until someone points them out. Consider this that someone.
Inside: a four-question burnout self-check you can do on the bike, why the gap between how you're doing and how you say you're doing is the first warning light, lowering the bar for the school holidays without guilt, and why five minutes a day beats the 5K run you keep not doing. With a little help from Brené Brown's Daring Greatly and Leonard Cohen's beauty of cracks.
Part of DAM Parenting's ongoing conversation about what it actually takes to stay well while raising kids far from home — because parents don't need fixing, they need conditions where they can function.
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Why Does a Hand Lotion Calm Me Down? Nervous System Regulation with Elif Durgel
15 juli 2026 · 26 min
You catch a smell. A lotion, a tea, something cooking. And in under a second — before you've even thought about it — you're home. Lees meer
That's not nostalgia. That's not weakness. That is your nervous system doing something remarkable.
This week we're joined by psychologist and cross-cultural specialist Elif Durgel, founder of Roots and Wings Academy in Eindhoven, for a warm, science-light conversation about why smell bypasses the thinking brain entirely and connects directly to memory, identity and emotion — and what that means for international parents living far from where they started.
We talk about:
Why smell hits faster and deeper than any other sense
What nervous system regulation actually feels like from the inside
The invisible extra load of living between cultures — and why July makes it louder
Why so many of us quietly deny ourselves the things that help
Why going to the expat shop isn't retail therapy — it's something more real than that
Whether you're heading home this summer, somewhere completely new, or discovering the Netherlands in July for the first time — this one is your permission slip.
20 minutes. No jargon. Just a really good conversation.
Find out more about Elif: rootsandwingsacademy.nl
Come tell us yours on Instagram -
What Is Trauma? Big T, Little T, and Why It Might Be You
8 juli 2026 · 31 min
Have you ever reacted to something and thought — why did I react like that? Or carried a weight you couldn't quite name? Lees meer
Today we're breaking down what trauma actually is — plainly, warmly, and without the jargon. Because if you're living in the Netherlands as an expat or immigrant, building a life far from home, navigating a foreign healthcare system, raising children in a second language — this conversation is for you.
We're joined by Adina Petre, clinical psychologist and trauma therapist , who will be joining us monthly to help us understand ourselves a little better, one episode at a time.
In this episode:
— What trauma actually is (and what it isn't)
— The difference between Big T and Little T trauma
— Why the nervous system doesn't grade on a curve
— What happens when we stay in survival mode for too long
— And why your experience is real, because it happened to you — and that is enoughShare this episode with someone who needs the words.
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Obligation Sex Is More Common Than You Think — Here's What It's Really Costing Your Relationship
1 juli 2026 · 24 min
This episode is brought to you by MamaSocial, who connect mums across the Netherlands so you actually have a community to lean on. Brunches, mingles, networking, whatever you need — MamaSocial will be hosting something near you. Check out their website and Instagram to find your nearest one now. Lees meer
Have you ever had sex because saying no felt harder than just getting it over with? In episode 3 of DAMSex, Eva sits down again with sex and intimacy counsellor Debby Poort to talk about obligation — or "duty" — sex, and what it quietly does to you, your partner, and your relationship over time.
They unpack what's really happening when one partner is having sex out of guilt rather than desire, and what it does to the partner on the receiving end of that obligation — most of whom don't actually want it that way. Debby introduces responsive desire, a concept that explains why "wanting" doesn't always come before "willing," and why that's a completely normal, healthy starting point — especially for parents whose spontaneous desire has quietly disappeared since having kids.
They also get into the orgasm gap, what a healthy "no" actually sounds like, how to respond to one without it becoming a wound, and how to keep this conversation going with your partner without it turning into an accusation.
This episode is part of the monthly DAM Sex series — sex, intimacy, and connection for international parents in the Netherlands, and honestly, everywhere else too. Brought to you this month with thanks to MamaSocial, supporting our community of mums across the Netherlands.
Find Debby Poort: yellowwood.nl
Got a question for Debby? Send it via Instagram DM or email damparentingpodcast @ gmail.com -
Queer Parenting in the Netherlands: Why One Dad Built a 250-Family Community From Scratch
27 juni 2026 · 28 min
When Aldo's daughter arrived via surrogacy in Canada, he looked around and realised he'd spent 10 years focused on becoming a dad — and forgotten to build a community for her. So he started a WhatsApp group for four or five families. Within months, it had grown to 250 members from every corner of the Netherlands. Lees meer
In this episode, Aldo — founder of Queer Families NL — talks about what it actually takes to raise a child in a rainbow family here, the gap between the Netherlands' progressive reputation and the lived reality for queer parents, and the moment his two-year-old daughter came home from City Hall and said: "Mama — baby Sophia haved two papas. Kaya haved two papas."
Whether you're a queer parent, an expat family finding your footing, or someone who simply wants to raise their kids in a more open world — this one's for you.
Find Queer Families NL on Instagram: @queerfamilies.nl Tiktok @queerfamiliesNL and Aldo and Kim on @2GayDadsinNL
DAM Parenting is the podcast for international and expat parents in the Netherlands. New episodes every week.
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Raising Bilingual Children in the Netherlands: What Summer Travel Really Does for Heritage Language Development
24 juni 2026 · 25 min
Your child speaks the school language all year without thinking. Your language — the one you grew up in, the one your parents use, the one you hoped would just stick — has to fight for space. And then summer comes. You get on a plane. And suddenly the whole dynamic shifts. Lees meer
In this episode, Eva talks to multilingualism specialist Mimi about what really happens to language development when families travel home — and why most parents underestimate how significant that window actually is.
They talk about the child who understands everything but answers in the wrong language, why love of family isn't always enough motivation, and how to have the conversations that actually help your child build a relationship with their own multilingual identity — not just manage it.
Practical, honest, and grounded in lived experience as a multilingual parent herself, Mimi brings a warmth to this topic that cuts through the anxiety and gives you something real to do.
For international families in the Netherlands navigating language, identity, and belonging.
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Coparenting After Separation in the Netherlands: One Dad's Honest Story
20 juni 2026 · 29 min
What actually happens after a relationship ends — when you have children together, you're living in the Netherlands, and your village is far away? Lees meer
Niko, a German dad, joins us this week to talk honestly about something most men never say out loud: the grief, the guilt, the fear of what separation would do to his kids — and how he came out the other side.
They talk about growing apart after years together, the question he had to ask himself when staying felt like slowly disappearing, why he believes ending a marriage and ending a family are not the same thing, and how he and his ex built a coparenting relationship they're both proud of.
This is not a conversation about divorce being easy. It's a conversation about what's possible when two parents put their children first — and take care of themselves in the process.
For any dad who is struggling and hasn't told anyone yet: this one's for you.
RESOURCES — Nationwide Netherlands
For children:
KIES (Kinderen In Een Scheiding Situaties) — free municipality-funded support groups for children aged 4–18. Available across the Netherlands. Self-refer or via your child's school. Find your local KIES via: kiesvoorhetkind.nl or kiesamsterdam.nl (Amsterdam-specific)
Villa Pinedo — online support platform for children and young people with divorced parents. Available in English. Buddy app, forum, and parent resources: villapinedo.nl/english
For parents:
Mediation in the Netherlands — if you need support building a parenting plan, a registered mediator can help. Search via the Dutch Mediation Federation: mfnregister.nl
Your gemeente — ask your local jeugdregisseur (youth coordinator) what coparenting support is available in your area. Every municipality is different.
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Why Becoming a Dad Made Me Finally Realise I Had ADD - Mens Mental Health Week
17 juni 2026 · 35 min
If you became a father and suddenly felt like you couldn't keep up — with the admin, the overwhelm, the switching, the forgetting — this episode is for you. Lees meer
Liam, founder of Dads Do Art and familiar Dam Parenting voice, joins Eva to talk about his late ADD diagnosis. What fatherhood revealed that decades of coping had hidden. How he navigated the Dutch healthcare system — the huisarts, the waiting lists, the private vs public route. Why he initially thought he'd fooled the professionals. What medication actually changed, and what it didn't. And the moment his mum arrived at the diagnostic session with every school report from age seven, and everything finally made sense.
This episode covers: adult ADHD and ADD diagnosis in the Netherlands, neurodiversity and fatherhood, burnout and undiagnosed attention difficulties, ADHD medication, ADHD therapy, and the very first step to take if you think this might be you.
For international parents in the Netherlands. Every Wednesday.
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Buying a House in the Netherlands: What No One Tells You
13 juni 2026 · 16 min
The Dutch housing market is fast, opaque, and genuinely unforgiving if you don't know the rules — and most of us didn't get the rulebook. Lees meer
In this episode, Eva is joined by Nic, co-founder of Buy Home Helper, who built a platform specifically for internationals navigating the Dutch home buying process after his own experience of lost bids, hidden costs, surprise neighbours, and a final invoice that came out of nowhere.
We get into what the market actually looks like right now, why more internationals are being pushed into buying whether they're ready or not, and how Buy Home Helper guides you from first search to signed keys — with the tips, warnings, and stage-gate reminders your makelaar probably isn't sharing.
If you're logging into Funda morning and night, building spreadsheets, and wondering if there's an insider club you somehow missed — this one's for you.
Exclusive offer for the Dam Parenting community: Use code DAMPARENTING at buyhomehelper.com — the first 10 listeners get a full year free.
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Vaccinations in the Netherlands: Everything International Parents Need to Know
10 juni 2026 · 33 min
Confused about vaccinations in the Netherlands? You're not alone — it's one of the most asked questions in every expat parenting group. This week I'm joined by Youth Healthcare physician Dr. Marenne van Hengel Budde for a complete, plain-English guide to the Dutch vaccination system — from pregnancy through to age 14, and everything in between. Lees meer
We cover the full Dutch National Immunisation Programme (RVP), why chickenpox isn't on the Dutch schedule, the BCG tuberculosis vaccination that surprises many international families, meningitis B, travel vaccinations, and how to check your child's vaccination record online in minutes.
IN THIS EPISODE:
The Dutch National Immunisation Programme — who runs it, how it works, and why your GP is probably not involved
Every vaccine on the schedule — from the whooping cough vaccine in pregnancy to the HPV vaccine at age 9, including the new RSV antibody (September 2025) and rotavirus vaccine (added 2024)
Chickenpox — why it's not in the Dutch programme, what to do if you want it privately, and why age 12 matters
BCG tuberculosis vaccine — who receives it, how the automatic invitation works, and what to expect from the skin reaction
Meningitis B — why it's not included in the Dutch programme and how to access it privately (and what it costs)
Travel vaccinations with babies and young children — where to go and how far in advance to plan
How to check your child's full vaccination record online at mijn.rivm.nl — in under 2 minutes
Missed a vaccination window? Here's what actually happens (it's probably not as bad as you think)
Arriving from abroad with an existing vaccination schedule — do you have to start again? No. Here's how it works.
ALL LINKS AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Dutch National Vaccination Programme (English): https://www.rivm.nl/en/dutch-vaccination-programme
🔗 Check your child's vaccination record online: https://mijn.rivm.nl
🔗 JGZ parental portal (online environment of the Youth Healthcare Centre): https://www.mijnk…
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‘We’re Housemates Who Share a Bed’ — How Can Emotionally Focused Therapy Help You?
3 juni 2026 · 19 min
‘We used to be so passionate. Now we’re housemates who just happen to share a bed. I’m scared we’ve lost something we can’t get back.’ Lees meer
IIn this episode, sex and intimacy counsellor Debby Poort answers it.
This month on DAM SEX, Eva and Debby go into Emotionally Focused Therapy — the attachment-based model that reframes ‘we have a sex problem’ as ‘we have a connection problem.’ They talk about the pursue–withdraw cycle, what it looks like in real couples, and why both people in the cycle are doing the exact same thing: trying to get their needs met.
Plus: the A.R.E. framework (Accessible, Responsive, Engaged), what emotional safety actually feels like in the body, and why couples wait an average of seven years before getting help.
The cycle is the problem. Not the couple.
Debby Poort — Sex & Intimacy Counsellor
Yellowwood | Amsterdam & Amstelveen
Website: www.yellowwood.nl
DAM SEX is monthly. Every episode builds.
Dam Parenting — every Wednesday.
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The Word They Used to Silence Women — And How We're Taking It Back
31 mei 2026 · 22 min
Gossip. Gossib. Godsib. The same word — and the meaning was changed on purpose. Lees meer
Before gossip became something shameful, it meant godsib: God's sibling. Your circle. The women who gathered around you when you gave birth, who cooked and held and stayed.
That tradition was deliberately dismantled — and we are reclaiming it.
In this final episode of the Maternal Mental Health Month series, I sit down with artist Sanne Freijdag, whose project the Gossib Gathering is doing exactly that: bringing women together over fabric, stitching, and the kind of honest conversation that happens when your hands are busy and your guard is down.
We cover the medieval history of women's gathering spaces, how the quilting circle became women's last sanctioned meeting place, the science of why working with your hands is so healing, and what matrescence — the becoming of a mother — has to do with all of it.
And we launch the next session: three Sunday sessions in Amsterdam Oost where we'll be making a quilt together for one pregnant woman in our community. Because you can't always see your village — but you can make something that proves it exists.
You don't need experience. You just need to show up.
Book your spot HERE
📅 28 June · 5 July · 12 July
12:30–16:30
GROND, Amsterdam
A donation of €10 on the day to fund the supplies is all that is asked!
Sanne Freijdag: www.freijdag.com
Instagram @sanne.freijdag
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You don't have to do this alone: MamaSocial, mum friendship and maternal mental health in the Netherlands
30 mei 2026 · 14 min
We close Maternal Mental Health Month with something the research says matters just as much as therapy: community. Rachael Forester — therapist and new lead of MamaSocial — joins Dam Parenting to talk about why mum friends aren't optional. The science of co-regulation. Why female friendship in early motherhood is neurologically unique. And what MamaSocial — the community space for international mothers across the Netherlands — actually looks like to walk into for the first time. Lees meer
If you've moved to the Netherlands, newly pregnant or just looking to fine more mom frirneds and you're doing this without your village yet — this one is for you.
MamaSocial runs events in Amsterdam, Rotterdam, Utrecht, Haarlem and more.
MamaSocial instagram page
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Delft Mama - The Thing That Actually Helps Expat Isolation
30 mei 2026 · 7 min
Maternal mental health doesn't always look like crisis. Sometimes it looks like not having a single person to call when your baby spikes a temperature at midnight. This week, as part of our Maternal Mental Health Month, Eva speaks to Robyn from Delft Mama — a volunteer-run charity that has been quietly building community for international families in and around Delft since 2007. Lees meer
They talk about what belonging actually does for a mother's mental health, why showing up to that first event is the hardest and most important step, and how a group of volunteers has built something that feels like the sisters and mothers so many of us left behind.
If you're in the Delft area or the surrounding areas feeling like you still haven't found your people — this one's for you.
Find Delft Mama on Instagram and Facebook, or at delfmama.nl.
For international parents in the Netherlands. Every Wednesday.
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Music, Dance & Mental Health: The Amsterdam Events Where Parents and Kids Can Let Go
30 mei 2026 · 12 min
When was the last time you danced? Not in the kitchen with a toddler on your hip — actually danced, to music you love, in a space that felt like yours? Lees meer
On this special episode on Dam Parenting closing up the Maternal Mental Health Month series, Eva is joined by Morgan and Sam from Tiny Grooves — two Australians, nine years in Amsterdam, five kids between them, and the creators of something genuinely wonderful: rave-style daytime events for parents and babies in real Amsterdam club venues.
We talk about why joy is one of the most underrated tools in the maternal mental health toolkit, what happens on a dance floor when a parent finally feels like themselves again, and why your baby actually loves techno.
Their next event is June 21st — Father's Day. See you there!
Find them at @tinygrooves on Instagram.
Dam Parenting — for international families in the Netherlands.
Outro Music is called 'Dream a Dream' by Moby.
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Finding Your People Abroad: How Expat Kids Eindhoven Is Fighting Expat Loneliness One Hangout at a Time
30 mei 2026 · 9 min
For those in the Eindhoven region, we have reached out to a community down there, ready and waiting to welcome you. Lees meer
On this episode I'm joined by Sylvia, founder of Expat Kids Eindhoven — a community she built from scratch after having her baby during COVID, far from her family in Colombia, and realising other international mamas were probably feeling exactly the same.
We talk about what actually happens when women walk into a space where they finally feel understood, why belonging isn't a luxury for expat moms, and what Sylvia would say to any mama who hasn't found her people yet.
If you're in or around Eindhoven, find Sylvia at expatkidsineindhoven.nl or on Instagram at expatkidsineindhoven_
This episode is part of our May Maternal Mental Health Month series.
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Singing for Mental Health: Why Mums Who Sing Together Feel Less Anxious, Less Alone
30 mei 2026 · 18 min
What if one of the most powerful things you could do for your mental health as a mother didn't involve a therapist, a screen, or a to-do list — but your own voice? Lees meer
This week on Dam Parenting, we're closing out our Maternal Mental Health Month series with something that surprised even us. Host Eva went along to a Singing Mamas session in Amsterdam — and felt it from the very first song.
Singing Mamas is a group singing movement for mothers that started in the UK and is now building community across the world. Babies are welcome from the earliest weeks. No musical experience needed. What happens in the room is something science is only beginning to catch up with: group singing regulates the nervous system, lowers cortisol, reduces anxiety, and creates a felt sense of safety and belonging that so many mothers quietly need and rarely find.
Eva sits down with Danielle, the woman who brought Singing Mamas to Amsterdam, to talk about what actually happens when mothers sing together — the emotional releases, the unexpected connections, the women who walked in disconnected and left feeling like themselves again.
This episode is for the mother who feels anxious, isolated, overstimulated, or not quite herself. The one who thinks "that's not for me" — and needs to hear why it might be exactly for her. This isn't wellness as performance. It's somatic, communal, and real.
In this episode we cover:
— Why singing together works differently to singing alone
— The psychology and neuroscience behind group vocalisation and stress relief
— What mothers experience emotionally when they allow themselves to let go and sing
— How community singing builds connection in the postpartum period and beyond
— What to expect if you walk into a session for the first timeIf you've been looking for something that goes beyond talking about your feelings — something somatic, accessible, and rooted in community — this one is for you.
You can find Danielle on Instagram at danielle.singingmamas.am…
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Starting Solids Anxiety: What to Feed Your Baby with Petit Gourmet Academy
27 mei 2026 · 35 min
Starting solids is meant to be an exciting milestone—but for many parents, it brings anxiety, confusion, and a constant feeling of getting it wrong. Lees meer
When do you actually start? What should your baby eat first? Is baby-led weaning realistic—or just something we see on Instagram? And what does “starting solids” actually look like when you’re living in the Netherlands, shopping in Dutch supermarkets, and raising your child between cultures?
In this episode, I’m joined by Melody, a paediatric and perinatal dietitian from Petit Gourmet Academy, who supports families from pregnancy through to the family table.
Together, we talk about:
The real signs your baby is ready for solids (beyond just age)
The most common anxieties parents face—and what’s actually normal
First foods in real life (not just perfect plates online)
Purees vs baby-led weaning vs doing what works for you
What feeding a baby actually looks like in busy, overwhelmed households
Affordable, realistic food options from Dutch supermarkets
Why feeding your baby can feel emotionally heavy—and how to reduce that pressure
This is not about doing it perfectly. This is about understanding what matters—and letting go of the rest.
Whether you’re approaching 4–6 months or already feeling the pressure, this episode is here to help you feel more confident, informed, and less alone.
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Postpartum Mental Health in the Netherlands: Veronika's Honest Story
23 mei 2026 · 25 min
In the Netherlands, if you are experiencing postpartum depression (PPD), your first point of contact should be your huisarts (general practitioner) or verloskundige (midwife). They can formally diagnose you and provide a referral to specialized, Dutch healthcare-covered psychological care. Lees meer
There is the Pop Poli clinic, which we prevoiusly had on as a guest 2 years ago, A POP-poli (Psychiatrie, Obstetrie, Pediatrie) is a specialized outpatient clinic in Dutch hospitals that provides care for women with a desire to have children, who are pregnant, or who have recently given birth, and who are dealing with mental health challenges. They are located in all major hospitals:
OLVG Amsterdam, St Antonius Utrecht, Catharina Ziekenhuis Eindhoven, Antes Rotterdam are some examples.
Equally there are nationwide psychological support teams which you can go through your huisarts to get referred to such as: Psyche zwangerschap and Postpartum Centrum Nederland
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Am I Doing Enough? The Mental Load of Raising a Bilingual Child, with Mimi
20 mei 2026 · 27 min
We talk a lot about the beauty of raising multilingual children — the richness, the connection, the gift of language. But what about what it actually costs to hold it all together?In this episode for Maternal Mental Health Month, host Eva welcomes back multilingual family coach Mimi from Growing up Multilingual, for an honest conversation about the side of language parenting that rarely gets named: the mental load.They explore why it's not the languages themselves that wear you down — it's the isolation, the pressure to stay consistent when life isn't, the guilt, the grief, and the endless feeling of being the only one keeping it all from slipping away.Mimi also shares what actually helps: building community, creating simple and realistic plans, sharing the responsibility, and — perhaps most importantly — knowing when to let go.If you've ever asked yourself "am I doing enough?" or "is it too late?" — this one's for you.Topics covered:– Why multilingualism isn't the problem, but the conditions around it often are– The perfectionism trap and how social media distorts reality– What to do when one parent carries all the language responsibility– Practical ways to reduce the mental load without abandoning your goals– What to prioritise when things feel truly overwhelming Lees meer
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The Algorithm Isn't Your Friend Postpartum with Eva from the Joy Embassy
18 mei 2026 · 28 min
If you have ever lain awake in the dark, baby in arms, scrolling Instagram and feeling quietly worse with every post you see — this episode is for you. Lees meer
This week as part of our Maternal Mental Health Month series, Eva sits down with positive psychologist Eva from The Joy Embassy for an honest, warm conversation about what social media really does to new mothers in the Netherlands — and what we can actually do about it. But the conversation goes further than most: into the history of how community itself collapsed when television arrived in the 1950s, into sociology of the forbidden emotions of motherhood, and into what it means to try to build real human connection in the jungle years of early parenthood.
In this episode:
Why seeing happy motherhood online makes struggling mothers feel worse — and the research behind it
How the algorithm actively shapes your postpartum experience without your consent
The history of community collapse — from bowling alleys to living rooms to Instagram
What de tropenjaaren (the jungle years) means, and who reaches back
What positive psychology actually offers a mother in the dark — beyond toxic positivity
Rachael Forester's new community space — real alternatives to scrolling
- Find our more about Rachael's new community space check out her website: RachaelForesterTherapy and scroll to bottom to find a sheet you can fill out. This is not a replacement for crisis, specialist care or therapy. It's an opporunity to find grounding in such a ground shaking moment of parenthood in general.
I am not an expert. I am a parent with questions and a computer, trying to let people overhear conversations that might help them feel less alone. For international mothers in the Netherlands navigating postpartum far from home: you are not alone. And this podcast is my way of reaching back.
If you wan to read articles - check out these ones:
Exploring the influence of social media ‘Mumfluencers’ on postpartum body image
Exploring the influe…
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ADHD in Motherhood: The Shame, the Chaos & Finding Your Way Back to Yourself
16 mei 2026 · 29 min
Do you ever feel like you're constantly dropping the ball, losing yourself in the chaos of motherhood, or just can't seem to keep up — no matter how hard you try? It might not just be motherhood. In this episode, originally aired as part of our 2024 Maternal Mental Health series, I'm joined by Emma, founder of ADHD Potential, a mother and ADHD coach who knows this reality from the inside out. Lees meer
We talk about what ADHD actually looks like in mothers — because it doesn't always look the way you'd expect — the shame spiral that so many women carry silently, emotional dysregulation, executive dysfunction, and the strategies that can genuinely help. We also talk about why so many women go undiagnosed for years, and what to do if you suspect ADHD but don't know where to start.
If you're based in the Netherlands, we cover how the referral process works and what to expect, including waiting times and insurance coverage.
This episode is part of Damn Parenting's Maternal Mental Health Month series — bringing honest, real conversations about the things that affect us as mothers, the ones we don't always get to say out loud.
In this episode:
What ADHD in motherhood really looks like
Why so many women are diagnosed late — or not at all
The shame and guilt that comes with it, and how to work through it
Practical strategies for managing ADHD as a mother
How to get diagnosed in the Netherlands
Why "good enough" parenting is not only okay — it's necessary
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Touched Out, Low Desire & Feeling Like a Feeding Machine: Let’s Talk About Sex After Baby
13 mei 2026 · 27 min
You’re exhausted. You’re touched-out. You haven’t wanted sex in months and you’re quietly wondering if something is broken. Lees meer
Nothing is broken.
This Maternal Mental Health month we’re talking about what nobody talks about: what actually happens to your body, your brain, your desire — and your sense of yourself as a sexual being — after you become a mother.
We are joined by Debby Poort, a sex and intimacy counselor based in Amstelveen at her psychotherapy practice Yellow Wood. She also works online.
We talk about matrescence and the body. Breastfeeding and desire. Guilt. Performance anxiety. And why your pre-baby self is not the benchmark.
For the woman at 2am who hasn’t had sex in 6 months and is scared it’s gone forever: it isn’t. This episode is for you.
Part of the Maternal Mental Health Month series.
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What's actually normal after birth (and what isn't) — pelvic floor physiotherapy in the Netherlands
11 mei 2026 · 22 min
After birth, so many women are told their symptoms are normal — and then left to quietly wonder if they are. Leaking, pain, pressure, discomfort during sex. Normal? Or not?
This week I'm joined by Sofía, a pelvic floor physiotherapist based in The Hague with 13 years of specialist experience — and an immigrant herself who understands the unique position international families are in when navigating Dutch healthcare.
We cover what's actually normal in the first six weeks postpartum, when to seek help, what a pelvic floor physio appointment in the Netherlands actually involves (including the parts nobody warns you about), and the one thing Sofía wants every woman to hear: there is always a solution.
For the international parent in the Netherlands sitting with something they haven't told anyone: this one is for you. Lees meer -
Late night recording - but for us on Mothers Day
9 mei 2026 · 5 min
After a late phone call with a friend, I felt the urge to record something very different than usual, as we already are bombarderd with Mothers Day deals, discounts and bundles - but the reality is - we don't want or need more stuff. Our mental overload is barely dealing with managing our home as it is. Lees meer
So this was mine to you. Just words - and acknowledgement for all you go through, raisinig kids, on the daily.
Happy Mothers day.
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Why Pregnancy Loss Doesn't End When a Healthy Baby Arrives
6 mei 2026 · 15 min
There are some experiences in motherhood that don't end when we think they will. Lees meer
Pregnancy loss is often spoken about as something that happens — and then we move forward. But what's talked about far less is what happens when the grief doesn't stay in the past. When it returns in another pregnancy. Or shows up after your healthy baby is born.
Today I'm joined by Dr. Renée Out — a doctor, bereavement counsellor, and founder of Renée Begeleiding — who works closely with women navigating the emotional impact of miscarriage, stillbirth, abortion, and medical pregnancy loss.
We talk about why grief doesn't follow timelines, why a healthy baby doesn't erase a previous loss, how the body holds what the mind tries to move past, and what partners can actually do to help.
If you've ever thought: "I should feel grateful… so why do I still feel this?" — this one is for you.
Part of our Maternal Mental Health Month series.
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Postpartum Rage: Why New Mothers Get Angry, Who It Lands On, and How to Get Help in the Netherlands
4 mei 2026 · 32 min
Nobody told you about this part. Lees meer
The rage that rises from nowhere. The way you can go from calm to completely overwhelmed in seconds. The fact that it almost always lands on your partner — while the actual source of the pressure stays invisible.
Postpartum rage is one of the most common and least talked-about experiences of early motherhood. It is not a character flaw. It is a nervous system under siege.
I sit down with Dr. Naomi Gibson, couples therapist and Dam Parenting's resident psychologist, to talk about what postpartum rage actually is, why it happens, who it targets, and what getting help looks like in the Netherlands.
We cover:
The clinical definition — and why postpartum rage isn't in the DSM even though it's real
The hormone and sleep science behind it
Why expat and international parents carry an additional isolation layer that makes it worse
How to access support in the Netherlands: verloskundige, huisarts, POP-poli, GGZ
How couples can start to talk about this without it becoming another argument
This is the first episode in our Maternal Mental Health series.
If you are holding it together on the outside, this one is for you.
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Maternal Menal Health Month - it starts here.
1 mei 2026 · 9 min
This month is about the conversations we don’t say out loud. Lees meer
I’m bringing in familiar voices and new ones to talk about maternal mental health, the reality of motherhood, and what it actually feels like beneath the surface.
These are not easy conversations.
They may feel uncomfortable at times.But they matter.
Because motherhood can be both a gift…
and one of the most draining, excruciating, identity-shifting experiences we go through.And yet, so many of us are expected to carry on
as if our entire world hasn’t been turned upside down.These episodes are not for everyone.
But they are for someone.
They’re not here to give you answers.
They’re not here to “fix” anything.They’re here so you can hear something and think:
“Okay… it’s not just me.”
You are not meant to suffer in silence.
You are not meant to do this without support.
You are not meant to navigate this without a village.So take what you need from this month.
Leave what you don’t.
And if something resonates—
reach out, share it, or start a conversation of your own.Because it matters.
And you matter in this too.