How To Talk To Kids About Anything
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296 afleveringen, van nieuw naar oud
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How to talk to kids about resourcefulness with Scott Sonenshein – ReRelease
14 juli 2020 · 34 min
Special Guest: Scott Sonenshein Lees meer
This podcast provides:
Tips: How to help our kids do more with less and become more resourceful. How can we be more creative? Scott also talks about taking “field trips,” creative atypical birthday parties, reaffirming play, modeling, little seed creativity.
Scripts: Saying no to our children, what to say when your child wants a new toy
Steps: Taking a child through how to be resourceful when wanting a new toy. How can we look at what we have in unique ways?
Barriers to success: By saying yes to everything we create a dependence on “more stuff” and we rob our kids of the ability to get creative.
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How to Help Parents & Kids Cope with Big Issues During Tough Times with Rosalind Wiseman
7 juli 2020 · 59 min
Rosalind Wiseman - We all need to hone the ability to regulate ourselves and teach and model for our children and students how to do the same. That means sharpening our social and emotional skills so that we can function and thrive in today’s society—creating healthy relationships and health and wellbeing for ourselves as well. What are the core social and emotional concepts that we need to understand? How does our understanding of how we deal with anger, frustration, shame, discomfort and anxiety play a role on how we relate to others and how we conduct ourselves with others? We all need support in these areas- now more than ever—for both ourselves and the young people we care for each day. To delve into these important topics, I will be interviewing the fabulous Rosalind Wiseman for the second time on How to Talk to Kids about Anything. Lees meer
From where we learn to where we work, Rosalind Wiseman fosters civil dialogue and inspires communities to build strength, courage and purpose. She is the founder of Cultures of Dignity; an organization that shifts the way communities think about our physical and emotional wellbeing by working in close partnership with the experts of those communities–young people, educators, policy makers, and business and political leaders. A multiple New York Times best-selling author including Queen Bees and Wannabes that was made into the movie and musical Mean Girls, a frequent contributor to the New York Times, Washington Post and other publications and international speaker, she lives in Boulder Colorado with her husband and two sons. She and her team created these very handy and helpful “tiny guides,”- a set of small books on everything from dignity to emotional granularity to anger and shame that provide tools and skills to manage ourselves and our relationships (and help the young people we love and guide to manage themselves and their relationships) under exceptional circumstances.
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How to Talk to Kids about Healthy, Caring Romantic Relationships with Dr. Richard Weissbourd – ReRelease
30 juni 2020 · 33 min
This podcast will focus on how to talk to kids about healthy, caring, romantic relationships. When you were a teen, who taught you about how to have a mutually beneficial, successful romantic relationship? Who is teaching your teen? Dr. Weissbourd and his team released a report on May 17th called The Talk: How Adults Can Promote Young Healthy Relationships and Prevent Misogyny and Sexual Harassment. This report highlights what adults have NOT been doing to help prevent misogyny among teens and to prepare young people for caring, ethical romantic and sexual relationships. This podcast expands on what Dr. Weissbourd and his team found and how we can personally answer the question: What do we, as key adults in the lives of teens, really understand about healthy, caring romantic relationships and how can we convey this to our kids? Lees meer
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How to Talk About Racism, Adoption and Parenting a Black Boy in America with Nefertiti Austin
23 juni 2020 · 54 min
Nefertiti Austin - Each year, thousands of Americans choose to go through the adoption process to build their families. Those who know me, know that my 2 children were both adopted by my husband and myself and also happen to be full blood siblings. Just a little bit over 12 years ago, we began the adoption process and went through the many feelings that come with adoption, and for us, an open adoption, with our children’s birth family. We did it again just 16 months after my daughter was born with my son. Every adoption is deeply personal and different depending on who is involved and the decisions that the many people involve make or has to make in order to ensure that the process ends with a well-cared for, loved child. It’s not a cookie-cutter process. Adoption is just a piece of what we are going to discuss today- because there is a very important layer of discussion that my next guest brings to light as well and that is, race and gender as it relates to fostering, adopting and parenting in America. She puts high beams on the question; “what are the challenges that single black women must face when fostering, adopting and parenting in America? And a secondary question that we will also explore which is, how can we raise black boys in America understanding the racism and stereotypes that seem to be weaved into the fabric of American culture? Lees meer
We remember the past stories of young black boys senselessly killed such as Trayvon Martin—but then hear recent accounts of young black men killed because they were jogging in a white neighborhood or a woman calling the cops on a black man watching birds in Central Park because he requested that she leash her dog. How does a mother parent a black boy in an America that assumes that black boys are doing the wrong thing even when they are doing the right thing? Or, where my next guest writes, “where a hoodie plus a black male is synonymous with danger?” This is an important topic for everyone. If changes are going to be made …
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How to Talk to Kids about Stress Management with Lori Lite – ReLaunch
16 juni 2020 · 41 min
Special Guest: Lori Lite Lees meer
More and more, kids are feeling stressed out in today’s world. This is a topic that comes up often- and of course it does, between academics, sports, homework, performance, lack of free play, reduced recess, political unrest, overworked parents and more, kids are being pulled in many directions and so are parents. Stress is part of the landscape in many families. It’s a great privilege to be able to call on the parenting experts who study stress and stress management as a living to help us know what to do, how to stay calm and how to help our kids with stress management.
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How to Prepare Kids to Thrive in a Rapidly Changing World with Madeline Levine, PhD
9 juni 2020 · 54 min
Madeline Levine, PhD - The pandemic is still going strong and the date to open many states is being pushed out further and further. A few states are starting to open here and there but many parents still feel a lot of anxiety around going back to “normal” even as COVID-19 has claimed over a quarter of a million lives across the world, nearly 100, 000 of them in the US. What’s going on is impacting young children, older children and yes, parents too. Of course, parents too! There are questions of financial issues, emotional issues, mental issues, loneliness, fear, frustration and how we are all going to cope with the day to day as the day to day morphs into months and months. It puts a lot on our shoulders. Let’s not bury it. Let’s discuss it. Time to shine a light on what’s really going on behind closed doors. For this discussion, I’m interviewing Graeme Seabrook.
Graeme Seabrook, The Mom for Moms, is a coach and writer who has been guiding and supporting mothers as they discover and reclaim themselves since 2014. She has worked with over 2500 moms since 2014 and in between clients she reads about moms, writes about moms, speaks about moms, learns from moms, and is a mom of two herself! Her work springs from the truth that embracing your humanity is a mother’s deepest calling and the very best thing you can do for your family.Madeline Levine, Phd - We live in an uncertain world. Modern times from politics to illness to how the economy functions, racial and gender bias and even the opening and closings of schools and camps has taught us that. Nobody can perfectly predict what is to happen from year to year, month to month and even from day to day. The world we know can feel disturbing and unfamiliar, at times. In the wake of what feels increasingly threatening and unpredictable to parents, moms and dads are pushing their kids to excel, swooping in to rescue them from struggle if it gives them an extra edge, and leaving the kids unprepared, fragile and reliant on oth… Lees meer -
How to Talk to White Kids about Race & Racism with Dr. Margaret Hagerman – ReRelease
30 mei 2020 · 52 min
This podcast will focus on how white kids are being educated about race and racism in America. While we know from research that black families teach their children about social inequalities, race and racism from an early age, what are white families doing? Are families and communities a place where white kids learn to become racist or a space where they learn to be antiracist or race-conscious? Do white kids learn, within the family paradigm, to challenge racial inequalities? Dr. Margaret Hagerman talks about her research and her new book: White kids: Growing Up With Privilege in a Racially Divided America. It’s an important topic that many people avoid out of discomfort or confusion with regard to how to discuss it. We get right into it on How to Talk to Kids about Anything. Lees meer
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How to Talk to Kids About Being Brave with Margie Warrell – ReLaunch
19 mei 2020 · 44 min
Special Guest: Margie Warrell Lees meer
This podcast provides:
Tips: Specific tips on what to do to help our children take healthy risks and lead a brave life.
Scripts: What to say (and how to show and model) to our kids about getting out of their comfort zone as well as what kinds of risks are worth taking.
How to add bravery into everyday experiences -
How to Help Parents Understand & Support their LGBTQ Kids with Kristin Russo
5 mei 2020 · 52 min
Kristin Russo - When a child or teen comes out to their parents as gay, parents are often left with many unanswered questions fueled by fear, lack of knowledge or concerns about the wellbeing of their child. The conversations that need to take place are not as much about you answering questions for your child but about your child answering questions for you. Your child has likely been navigating the coming-out process for quite some time, now, you will be faced with decisions about how you will react to the information. How will you share this information with others? How can you best support your child? What if you fear for their safety? What’s the deal with pronouns? You might also grapple with how your child’s sexuality fits in with your faith, your previous hopes and dreams for them and your relationship. Well, it doesn’t make sense to stick our heads in the sand. It’s time to learn the answers for everyday questions and concerns when you are a parent, aunt/uncle, teacher, grandparents of loved one of a kid who is gay. For guidance on this topic we have Kristin Russo on the show today. Lees meer
Kristin Russo is a writer, speaker, educator and consultant with a focus on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer (LGBTQ) issues. She is also co-host & producer of Buffering the Vampire Slayer alongside musician Jenny Owen Youngs, which was named one of the top 30 podcasts of the decade by Paste Magazine. She has a great book with co-author Dan Owens called This is a Book for Parents of Gay Kids. You can find her at kristinnoeline.com
The post How to Help Parents Understand & Support their LGBTQ Kids with Kristin Russo appeared first on Dr Robyn Silverman.
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How to Talk to Kids about being Mentally Strong with Amy Morin, LCSW – ReRelease
28 april 2020 · 45 min
Special Guest: Amy Morin, LCSW Lees meer
Ever wonder: What is the secret of success? Is it intelligence? Talent? Luck? Perhaps a bit. But more and more the research is telling us that the X-factor—the reason why some people fail and other succeed comes down to grit or what is sometimes referred to as mental toughness or mental strength. What is mental strength? How can we develop it? And How can parents, teachers and coaches help kids to develop mental strength? These are just some of the questions we are going to get answers to on today’s podcast with Amy Morin.
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How to Talk to Kids about StepFamilies and Blended Families with Ron L. Deal, MMFT
21 april 2020 · 1 uur 2 min
Ron L. Deal, MMFT - Every person in a family wants to feel loved and wants to be able to show love to others who they care about and appreciate. And while that concept may be simple- the execution can be surprisingly complicated as not everyone gives and receives love in the same way. Some may desire reassuring physical touch while another person enjoys compliments, encouragement and other words of affirmation. Still others may feel most loved when they receive gifts or their family members do acts of service for them—cooking, cleaning, picking up the dry cleaning, or fixing something that might help the other person. Some prefer quality time. Perhaps you recognize your love language in all of these—and the love languages of others in your family. Things get convoluted-- and well-intentioned people miss the mark when they, for instance, value acts of service but their partner or children show love through quality time or words of affirmation. Not to mention, this can be hard enough in a family that hasn’t gone through the life altering changes like divorce, remarriage or death of a parent—but what about the blended family who has to navigate step parents, step siblings, step grandparents with all of their nuances, needs, rules, emotions, concerns and ways that all of these different people want to feel valued and important? Blended families must deal with the pain of the past, the complexities of new relationships and the unique challenges that come with creating one family. As parents and stepparents, how can we have these important conversations about fear, loss, inclusion, empathy and connection—tying the binds between the biological family members and the new family members? How do we find love, strengthen it and keep it in a step family? For these answers, I have the honor of having a wonderful conversation with our guest today, Ron L. Deal. Lees meer
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How to Raise Joyful Kids In a Stressful World with Katie Hurley – ReRelease
14 april 2020 · 52 min
Special Guest: Katie Hurley Lees meer
This podcast provides:
Tips: Katie talks about watching for stress-signs, encouraging play, dealing with differences between parents and children, using empathic listening, using stress words and problem-solving, stop and label, self care, body mapping, deep breathing.
Scripts: Instead of problem solving, use some empathic listening and reflect back what your child is saying. Examples are given. Also how to talk to kids about pitching in when parents are stressed out (and ask for help when they are!).
Barriers to success: Differences between how parents and children cope with stress (coming from different worlds).
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How to Talk to Boys about Puberty, Sex, Porn and Body Image with Dr. Cara Natterson
7 april 2020 · 57 min
Dr. Cara Natterson - This podcast will focus on how to decode boys and talk to boys about puberty, sex, porn, nudes and body image. It’s vital that we talk to boys about these tough topics as it’s part of keeping them healthy and safe—and that’s a big part of our job as parents. Dr. Robyn Silverman interviews Dr. Cara Natterson about how to talk to boys about this sensitive subject matter. Boys deserve to have the right information that helps them learn about positive relationships and sex and, at the same time, helps to protect them from becoming vulnerable to societal messages about body image, pornography and violence. Lees meer
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How to Talk to Kids About Anger & Big Feelings with Wendy Young – ReRelease
31 maart 2020 · 47 min
Special Guest: Wendy Young Lees meer
This podcast provides:
Tips:
How to co-regulate
How to get off the anger merry-go-round.
How to use “a bug and a wish.”
How to help kids realize the anger cues
How to construct a mad box and why
How to process the feelings and interactions after the incident is over.
Speaking out loud about our own anger and how we process it
N.O.W. Learn how to Normalize, Offer opportunities/strategies, Work with children on managing big feelings
Scripts:
What to say when your children have big feelings and are showing intensity.
How to help children describe how big their feelings are at that moment.
Helping kids know what to do when they want to engage in negative behaviors- what can we do instead?
How to give hope when helping kids managing big, intense feelings
How to process the feelings after the incident is over
Walking through the steps of calming down our anger out loud.
Exactly what to say when children are in the throws of messy feelings.
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How to Talk to Kids about Women Who Take Risks & Lead with Diana Kapp
24 maart 2020 · 45 min
Diana Kapp - Although hidden from many history books, where credit wasn’t provided, or downplayed in media where coverage skewed towards gains boys and men were making, women have been making strides, creating useful inventions and running companies for longer than we know. But credit needs to be revealed if we are going to ensure that girls and boys have strong female role models and understand that women bring greatness, innovation, indomitable spirit, focus, ingenuity and leadership to this world in many of the same ways—and in different ways than do men. Without women’s creativity and persistence, we wouldn’t have some of the greatest inventions that we completely take for granted! Just dip back into history for a moment and we can reveal, for example, that the first dishwasher was developed by a woman. The Brooklyn Bridge? Woman. Windshield wipers, the game of monopoly, the brown paper bag? All developed by women. And today, we also have incredible examples of motivated, innovative women that are positive examples of taking risks, trying again, working hard, knocking off the negative self talk and forgetting about perfectionism on the way to success. We can learn a lot from these women- and today, we are going to discuss how we can use their stories to help inspire children when we are having conversations about such topics as success, persistence, risk-taking and perfectionism. And for that, I have invited author, Diana Kapp, on the show today. Lees meer
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How to Talk about Anxiety in Kids with Karen Young – ReRelease
17 maart 2020 · 1 uur 11 min
Karen Young has worked as a psychologist in private practice and in educational settings. She founded the popular website, Hey Sigmund, which attracts millions of readers each year. Karen is a sought-after speaker, both at home in Australia and internationally. She is the author of ‘Hey Warrior’, a book for kids to help them understand anxiety and find their ‘brave’. The book has now been translated into a number of languages—and we couldn’t be more thrilled to welcome her to How to Talk to Kids about Anything Lees meer
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How to talk to Kids about Money with Neale Godfrey – ReRelease
10 maart 2020 · 44 min
This podcast will focus on the talking to kids (and teaching kids) about money. Raising children who understand money is vital to their future financial health, independence and future fiscal behavior. Children and teens need to learn the value of money as well as how to budget, plan, earn, save, invest and give to causes and charities that mean something to them. Money management is a life skill that all children must learn—so let’s get the information we need right here! Lees meer
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How to Talk to Kids about Self-Injury with Dr. Janis Whitlock
3 maart 2020 · 46 min
This podcast will focus on self-injury and how to help young people who are self-harming to find healthier ways to cope with stress, pain and big emotions. Those who are self-injuring are not attempting to die by suicide but rather aiming to find a way to feel better. Those who self-injure need help and Dr. Janis Whitlock provides the information we need to best support and understand those who are self-injuring. Lees meer
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How to talk to Kids About the Gift of Failure with Jessica Lahey – (Re-Release)
25 februari 2020 · 47 min
This podcast will focus on the importance of allowing children to fail. Discover why, during the school-age and teen years, it is vital for parents and educators to allow young people to experience the disappointment, frustration and struggle that occurs when they are challenged by life’s problems. Find out how failure and learning to bounce back and ultimately succeed, put children on the path to growing up and becoming successful, resilient and self-reliant adults. Lees meer
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How to Talk to Boys about Sex with Peggy Orenstein
18 februari 2020 · 1 uur 6 min
Special Guest: Peggy Orenstein Lees meer
The pervasiveness of hook-up culture, ubiquity of locker room banter, accessibility of internet porn, media steeped with distorted images and wide acceptance of the “man box” or “bro culture” participation is having complex and negative effects on our boys. And as pornography has become a new kind of sex education that most boys are privy to by the tender age of 11 and sexual assault showing itself as a more commonplace occurrence, it is time for a change. As squeamish as it may make us, we’ve got to get talking to boys are sex. About consent. About empathy, porn, intimacy, media, misogyny, arousal, LGBTQ, connection. This, as you all know by now, is not just one talk but a series of little and bog discussions along the way. It is not just for Moms or just for Dads- this is for all of us. When we unravel the hidden truths and put high beams on the realities of young male sexuality and culture in today’s world, we create a provocative paradigm-shift that can help us move forward to raising more-informed boys and better men.
Peggy Orenstein is the New York Times bestselling author of Girls and sex, Cinderella Ate My Daughter, Waiting for Daisy, Flux and Schoolgirls. A contributing writer for the New York Times Magazine, she has been published in USA Today, Parenting, Salon, the New Yorker and other publications, and has contributed commentary to NPR’s "All Things Considered." Her new book has come out to glowing reviews and is called Boys and Sex, Young Men on Hook Ups, Love, Porn, consent and navigating the new masculinity. She lives in Northern California with her husband and daughter.
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How to talk to your child through the bedtime battle featuring Dr. Natasha Burgert (Re-Release!)
11 februari 2020 · 47 min
Special Guest: Dr. Natasha Burgert Lees meer
Today we are discussing how to talk your child through the bedtime battle—and win. I know- we all need it! How many parents can say “me too” when they hear a sleepy parent talk about how their child wouldn’t go to sleep or woke up in the middle of the night—many of us have dealt with this, me included. My own daughter has had night terrors, nightmares, and I’m just not tired kind of nights. Perhaps that’s happened to you? It’s not an easy scenario- everyone is tired, sometimes over tired, we, as parents, get stressed as we still have to get the dishes done, we have to finish some work or we just simply want to find a time to relax and unwind after a long day. We clocked out at 8:30 but our kids are still working it. Aren’t we lucky to have someone who can help us deal with this challenge today?
Dr. Natasha Burgert is a mom, pediatrician, blogger, educator, and National Spokesperson for the American Academy of Pediatrics. In her full-time suburban private practice, she strives to leverage the traditional values and teachings of medical science within today's digital health revolution. Her work with patients has been featured in outlets such as The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal and Parents magazine. She has also been highlighted on NBC Nightly News, CBS This Morning, and other local news programs If she is not in clinic, you can find her on KCKidsDoc.com; as well as Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. I had the pleasure of being teamed up with Dr. Natasha for an Education Nation’s Parent Toolkit Twitter Chat - she has incredibly helpful tips that we can use right away.
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How to Show Up for Our Children with Tina Payne Bryson, PhD
4 februari 2020 · 48 min
Special Guest: Tina Payne Bryson, PhD Lees meer
Parenting encapsulates so many different aspects of care when it comes to a child. We receive messages about paying attention to how children are doing in school, with friends, what they are eating, how much they are playing, how hard they are working, if they are reading enough, sleeping enough, getting outside enough and much, much more. And while all of this is important—what do you think is the most important thing that a parent can do to make the biggest difference in the long run? The research tells us, it’s all about showing up. In fact, studies show that the best predictors for how any child turns out in terms of happiness, academic success, leadership skills and strong relationships is whether at least one key adult in the life of a child has consistently and predictably shown up for them physical AND emotionally. So today, we are going to hone in on exactly how we can show up for the children in our lives so that they can thrive. For this conversation, we have invited best-selling author, Tina Payne Bryson, on the show today.
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How to Talk to Kids about Conflict, Dignity and Bullying with Rosalind Wiseman- ReRelease!
28 januari 2020 · 38 min
Special Guest Expert: Rosalind Wiseman. Today we are discussing how to talk to kids about treating each other with dignity and respect. What are the cultural messages that our kids receive? Are their differences between how boys deal with their relationships and girls cope with their relationships? How do kids bond and what do betrayals look like? How do we talk to other parents when our child has been an instigator of aggressive or bullying behavior and their child is the target AND how do we talk to the other parents when our child has been on the receiving end of aggressive or bullying behavior from their child. These are complicated questions and relationships- so thank goodness we have the best expert there is to talk about these issues, my friend and colleague, Rosalind Wiseman. Lees meer
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How to Build Resilience in Teens with Dr. Ken Ginsburg
21 januari 2020 · 49 min
Special Guest: Dr. Ken Ginsburg Lees meer
This podcast helps parents and educators discover how to build resilience in teens. As young people are working to gain more independence, they make more mistakes and must learn how to recover. Sometime they need to learn how to get back up after a big fall while other times they must learn how to move forward after small, everyday blunders. How can we help kids learn how to believe in themselves, their own skills, their own sense of control and adaptability while also knowing we are here when they really need us? We talk about the 7 Cs of resilience with Dr. Ken Ginsberg and receive some beautiful tips and scripts that help us know the dos and don’ts while raising teens who thrive no matter what twists and turns they encounter.
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How to Talk to Kids about Solving Sibling Rivalry with Dr. Laura Markham – ReRelease
14 januari 2020 · 50 min
Special Guest: Dr. Laura Markham Lees meer
Dr. Laura Markham trained as a Clinical Psychologist, earning her PhD from Columbia University. She is the mother of two, now ages 21 and 25. Dr. Laura is the author of the book Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting and Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How To Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life. You can find her online at http://www.ahaparenting.com
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How to Talk to Kids about Climate Change and the Environment with Mary DeMocker
8 januari 2020 · 46 min
Special Guest Expert: Mary DeMocker I remember, as a child, learning that you turn off the faucet while brushing your teeth. You close the refrigerator quickly and turn off the lights when you leave the room—little things- and they needed to be taught because otherwise, I admit, I hadn’t thought much about leaving the tap on, standing in front of the open fridge for minutes figuring out what I wanted to eat or leaving on the lights in every conceivable room. I’ve needed to teach it to my kids too- but of course, they sometimes forget. Sometimes protecting the Earth isn’t the first thought that comes to mind when you’re standing in the shower, letting the hot water fall on your head and back. For some, climate change might feel distant- like something happening elsewhere but not right here at home. Although this seems to be changing a bit- many families, all over the world have found that climate change has begun to touch their lives. Deadlier wild fires, increasingly crazy weather, additional information of melting ice caps on the nightly news- information coming to us through news anchors as well as out of the mouths of younger and younger activists that are demanding awareness and action. My own children have quoted information from Weird But True books and nature documentaries about what’s going on with the polar bears and tropical forests. The truth is, we are all feeling the effects and we are all contributing to the effects of climate change-- AND we are also able to help solve the problem. Of course, this means we must have the discussions that can bring about the change. It starts with opening our mouths and our hearts so that we can lay it all on the table. How do we give our children the facts about climate change- from discussions of fossil fuels to fluctuating animal habitats to sustainable and destructive energy sources so that they are in the know? And how can we, as families, alter how we live our lives, in small consistent ways, that will help creat… Lees meer
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How to Talk to Kids about Depression, Substance Abuse and Suicide with Anne Moss Rogers
7 januari 2020 · 46 min
Special Guest: Anne Moss Rogers Lees meer
This podcast will focus on how to talk to kids about depression, substance abuse and suicide from the perspective of a mother whose child died by suicide in 2015. Suicide is the second leading cause of death among individuals between the ages of 10 and 24, only behind unintentional injury, in the United States. Much of suicide has a correlation with depression and substance abuse—and while there is an epidemic of teen depression and suicide, only 45% of teen girls and 33% of teen boys who has experienced an episode of depression got treatment in 2019. It’s time to get talking. In fact, it’s talking and listening that can be the very thing that can prevent suicides from happening. We discuss the implications with Anne Moss Rogers, the author of Diary of a Broken Mind on this episode of How to Talk to Kids about Anything.
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How to Get Children to Behave from the Inside Out with Dr. Charles Fay
31 december 2019 · 1 uur 1 min
Special Guest: Dr. Charles Fay Lees meer
As parents, we have heard that the days are long and the years are short. The days can be filled with mistakes, sibling rivalry, tantrums, boundary testing, bedtime battles and tough discussions—and even as they are interspersed with fun, excitement, pride, connection and love, as parents, it’s normal to feel frustrated at times and want tools to help make the days go a bit more smoothly. The truth is, we DO only have a relatively short time to help raise our children to become responsible, capable and confident before they head out the door as adults. To put it in perspective, Dr. Laura Markham told us on one of the three episodes of How to Talk to Kids about Anything that she did with us that we only have 900 weeks with our kids before they turn 18 so be fully present when you are with them--- and Vicki Hoefle reminds us with a similar sentiment, “parent the child who will be 24 in a hot second. Parenting is not about what happens for you between the ages of 0 and 18, Parenting is what happens for our children between the ages of 18 and 80.” Let that sink in for a bit there. So, how do we parent our children, knowing that we don’t have a lot of time to, in fact, parent them, but the time we spend is so important. Our next guest will tell us that it’s about parenting with love and logic and getting children to behave from the inside out.
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How to Listen and Effectively Communicate with Children with Bento Leal
17 december 2019 · 42 min
Special Guest: Bento Leal Lees meer
We all know that one of the most important parts of talking to kids—or really, talking to anyone you care about, is listening. Of course, with so many obligations, online notifications, overfilled schedules and to-dos, listening these days can sometimes be a challenge. Still, it’s listening, that builds trust, allows for mutual understanding, creates connection and helps us to avoid miscommunication. Most people will tell you that is no better conversation than one that makes you feel like someone really listened, saw your point, got you. And this is absolutely true for both adults and children. The right kind of listening can help our kids divulge what’s really on their minds and hearts now…and in the future. What is the secret to listening in a way that gets our kids talking? For that, we turn to Bento Leal.
Bento Leal is a Relationships Skills Trainer and Bestselling Author who has taught marriage and relationship skills classes and parenting skills classes to more than 2500 couples and singles at family resource centers, community organizations, churches, substance abuse recovery programs, county jails and federal prison throughout California. In 2017, he published his first book “4 Essential Keys to Effective Communication in Love, Life, Work—Anywhere!” It continues to be an Amazon Best Seller in several categories and has sold more than 50,000 copies to date.
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How to talk to Kids about Empathy and Entitlement with Dr. Michele Borba (Re-Release!)
10 december 2019 · 41 min
Special Guest: Dr. Michele Borba Lees meer
What is needed to help kids succeed in today’s world? Goals? Commitment? Drive? Perhaps. But our next guest has an answer to that question that might surprise you: empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. It allows our hearts to go out to others, helps us to care deeply, help, uplift, connect and love. In a world that often seems to shout, “go big or go home,” “take no prisoners,” and “let’s take a selfie!” empathy seems to be getting crowded out of the child-raising conversation- and yet, empathy is vital to health, wealth, happiness, relationship satisfaction and resilience. It promotes kindness, reduces incidents of bullying and boosts critical thinking skills. Empathy, according to our next guest, is the core to everything that makes a society civilized, but above all, it makes out children better people. And who doesn’t want that? I am so excited to have my friend and colleague, Dr. Michele Borba, on the show today.
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How to Talk to Kids about Climate Change and the Environment with Mary DeMocker
3 december 2019 · 46 min
Special Guest Expert: Mary DeMocker I remember, as a child, learning that you turn off the faucet while brushing your teeth. You close the refrigerator quickly and turn off the lights when you leave the room—little things- and they needed to be taught because otherwise, I admit, I hadn’t thought much about leaving the tap on, standing in front of the open fridge for minutes figuring out what I wanted to eat or leaving on the lights in every conceivable room. I’ve needed to teach it to my kids too- but of course, they sometimes forget. Sometimes protecting the Earth isn’t the first thought that comes to mind when you’re standing in the shower, letting the hot water fall on your head and back. For some, climate change might feel distant- like something happening elsewhere but not right here at home. Although this seems to be changing a bit- many families, all over the world have found that climate change has begun to touch their lives. Deadlier wild fires, increasingly crazy weather, additional information of melting ice caps on the nightly news- information coming to us through news anchors as well as out of the mouths of younger and younger activists that are demanding awareness and action. My own children have quoted information from Weird But True books and nature documentaries about what’s going on with the polar bears and tropical forests. The truth is, we are all feeling the effects and we are all contributing to the effects of climate change-- AND we are also able to help solve the problem. Of course, this means we must have the discussions that can bring about the change. It starts with opening our mouths and our hearts so that we can lay it all on the table. How do we give our children the facts about climate change- from discussions of fossil fuels to fluctuating animal habitats to sustainable and destructive energy sources so that they are in the know? And how can we, as families, alter how we live our lives, in small consistent ways, that will help creat… Lees meer
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How to Talk to Kids about Saying No and People Pleasing with Susan Newman, PhD
26 november 2019 · 45 min
Special Guest Expert: Susan Newman, PhD Do you or does your child have trouble saying “no?” Do you find yourself saying “yes” to your children when you really want to say “not today,” “I can’t swing it,” or just plain “no?” Does your child over-stretch or over-commit because s/he can’t seem to say no? Perhaps you or your child is what my next guest calls “a master of yes and a novice of no.” But is all this people-pleasing a problem? As you might have already guessed, of course it is. And- As it turns out, even though it might be difficult to say no, it’s vital that we learn how to do it for our own health, wellbeing and stress-levels—and also so that we are teaching our children how to do it too. Is it uncomfortable to say no? Sure, it can be. But constantly saying yes can cause anxiety, anger, stress, regret and feelings of powerlessness. We definitely don’t want that. For the many ways to say no and mean it, we turn to Susan Newman. Lees meer
Social psychologist, Susan Newman is the author of 15 books in the parenting field. Her research examines such areas as building strong family bonds and raising only children as well as the difficulties of being working parent. She is a regular contributor to Psychology Today and U.S News & World Report. She is the author of Little Things Long Remembered: Making Your Children Feel Special Every Day and The Book of NO: 365 Ways to Say It and Mean It—and Stop People-Pleasing Forever. You Follow her on Facebook at DrSusanNewman and sign up for her free Monthly Family Life Alert Newsletter on her website SusanNewmanPhD.com.
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How to Talk to Kids about Big Feelings & Calming Down Strategies Featuring Dr. Lynne Kenney Re-Release
12 november 2019 · 40 min
As a parent or a teacher, you might have had moments where children experience overwhelming feelings such as anger, anxiety or agitation leading to fitful moments, tantrums and melt-downs. Who hasn’t? Statistics tell us that 20% of young children have tantrums daily—this is normal. And as children get older, some still have trouble dealing with over-the-top feelings. And let’s be honest- at times these feelings don’t only challenge children—but they challenge us, as adults, as well. Today we are talking with Dr. Lynne Kenney about how to help children get calm on the spot and develop better tools and strategies for coping with BIG feelings. Lees meer
Lynne Kenney, Psy.D., is a Harvard-trained psychologist, mother of two, an international educator, author and pediatric psychologist in Scottsdale, AZ. Dr. Kenney’s works include the Social-Emotional Literacy program Bloom Your Room™; Musical Thinking; Bloom: 50 things to say, think and do with anxious, angry and over-the-top-kids and 70 Play Activities For Better Thinking, Self-Regulation, Learning and Behavior all of which you can find through www.lynnekenney.com.
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How to Help Kids Grieve When a Sibling Dies
5 november 2019 · 45 min
Typically, our experts are best-selling authors and top experts who have studied a topic for many years as a researcher, writer, professional and adult. But sometimes, our best experts are the children themselves who are going through a unique situation that make it so only a small portion of people like them would understand. Lees meer
Every once in a while, I will be putting in a special kid edition of How to Talk to Kids about Anything so that we get this “expert” “in-the-trenches” view of what it’s like to be on the other end of these conversations with insights on what kids really need, want and would ask for from us, as adults, if we would be open to it. And- we are open to it, aren’t we? So here we are with this first kids’ edition of the How to Talk to Kids about Anything podcast—and you’ll see why it’s so important that we ask a teen who is going through this journey to talk about her views, take-aways and tips—so the adults who find themselves in a helper role such as this, are prepared.
When people hear that one of my dearest friends suffered the loss of her 13-year-old son, Gavin, after his 16-month battle with Ewing’s Sarcoma, they often say something like; “no parent should experience the death of a child.” As a mother and a best friend, I agree. It is heart-wrenching and tragic and makes me cry in random moments as it just happened in August of this year. But there is a secondary loss that many don’t often consider to the same degree, and that is the loss of a sibling. My bestie’s amazing 15-year-old daughter, Jadyn, who I am fortunate enough to have in my life as who I refer to as my “adopted niece” and she refers to me as her Aunt, is also suffering. She is learning how to live, love and find joy in this new normal and moving forward without her brother by her side.
Studies tell us that when a sibling passes away during childhood or the teenage years, it can have a profound impact on surviving children. The development of independence, romantic relationsh…
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How to Talk to Kids about Depression, Conflict & Coping with Katie Hurley
29 oktober 2019 · 45 min
Special guest: Katie Hurley Lees meer
According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, approximately one out of five teens has a mental health disorder, diagnosable by clinical methods, and nearly one-third show symptoms of depression. Now you might be thinking- well, many teens seem depressed to me, their moods and their emotions are all over the place! Stress is overwhelming! Yes, that can be true- symptoms of depression in adolescents aren’t always easy to identify because they often appear as normal adolescent behavior. But if we keep an eye open for consistent depressed behavior and indicators like, fatigue, changes in sleep patterns, changes in eating patterns, social withdrawal, and/or anger- these can serve as early warning signs that can allow us to get help for our teens as depression is absolutely treatable but NOT fixable on its own. Teens who have depression need therapy, support at home and yes, some also need medication. There’s no quick fix and thankfully, we have Katie Hurley here to explain how we know if our child needs help, what we and our teens can do at home to assist and what exercises and tools we can use to improve mood, self-esteem and motivation.
Katie Hurley, LCSW, is a child and adolescent psychotherapist, parenting expert, and writer. She is the founder of “Girls Can!” empowerment groups for girls between ages 5-11. Hurley is the author of The Happy Kid Handbook” “No More Mean Girls,” (both subjects we have interviewed Katie on previously on How to Talk to Kids about Anything) and her new workbook, The Depression Workbook for Teens, which is the #1 new release on Amazon for Teen and Young Adult Self Esteem and Self Reliance Issues. Her work can be found in The Washington Post, PBS Parents, and US News and World Report, among other places. She practices psychotherapy in the South Bay area of Los Angeles and earned her BA in psychology and women’s studies from Boston College and her MSW from the University of Pennsylvania. She split…
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How to Help Kids Learn Friendship Skills and Avoid Social Isolation with Caroline Maguire
15 oktober 2019 · 50 min
Special guest: Caroline Maguire Lees meer
A child hangs back in gym class because he just knows he’ll be the last one picked. Another child monologues nonstop about dinosaurs on every playdate and still another talks nonstop throughout the movie even though everyone asks her to stop. They don’t get invited to birthday parties, are thought of too much or too little, & playdates often end poorly. Do you know any of these children? Every child struggles with something—and many have social challenges that, at their root, are issues with executive function and a need for social skills training. And while this may seem like just child’s play- those who know and love the children who struggle in the area of friendship know that it can be a very lonely place to be. The child often wants to have friends but isn’t picking up on social cues, the need to be flexible, and how to connect with same-age peers. They may ask, in one way or another, the heart-breaking question—Why Will No One Play With Me?
Caroline Maguire is a personal coach who works with children with ADHD and the families who support them. Caroline earned her ACCG (Advanced Level Certification) from the ADD Coach Academy and her PCC (Professional Certified Coach Certification) from the International Coach Federation (ICF). She also received a Master of Education from Lesley University. Her revolutionary coaching program and methodology helps teach executive function skills to children, teenagers, and young adults. She is a former coach for the Hallowell Center in Sudbury, MA. While with the Hallowell Center, Caroline was the main coach for children and teenagers. Caroline consults with schools and families internationally and has been co-leading social skills groups for over a decade. She is also the author of a NEW book called Why Will No One Play With Me? The Play Better Plan to Help Children of All Ages Make Friends & Thrive
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How to Talk to Kids about the Connection between Kindness and Wellness with Kelli Harding, MD
1 oktober 2019 · 53 min
Special guest: Kelli Harding, MD Lees meer
We all hear medical stories of triumph and frustration—there are so many mysteries when it comes to health- why some people, who are biologically healthy, but feel ill—and some patients who are biologically ill, but feel healthy. Doctors have racked their brains for years- looking for patterns, problems, links that somehow explain why certain people get better quickly and others get sick quickly and don’t recover. And perhaps it might surprise you, as you will hear in the next interview—that how we feel is not necessarily about the dosage of medication or the brilliance of the doctor but about something simpler- something much more common and humane but something that isn’t always provided—and it comes down to the science of kindness, connection and human compassion. When we look at our children- and notice that some thrive and some continue to falter, it will be interesting to look through the lens of kindness, compassion and connection to see if this is any area that needs to be bolstered in the lives of the kids we know and love. The lives that are often stressed with go, go, go hours being shuttled from sports practices to music practice to hours of homework, where they spend a great deal of time in school where many might not feel seen and heard, where social media can make us feel more disconnected, envious and perfectionistic than ever-- How could some shifts of the heart, in the time we spend, with who we spend it with-- make the difference in the wellness of our children and ourselves? For that, we turn to Dr. Kelli Harding.
Dr. Kelli Harding is an assistant clinical professor of psychiatry at Columbia University Irving Medical Center. She is a diplomat of the American Board of Psychiatry and Neurology, as well as boarded in the specialty of psychosomatic (mind-body) medicine. Kelli has spent much of her career in the emergency room at New York-Presbyterian Hospital, and has appeared on Today, Good Morning America, NPR, T…
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How to Talk to Kids When Something Bad Happens in the World with Dawn Huebner, PhD
17 september 2019 · 41 min
Special guest: Dawn Heubner, Ph.D Lees meer
We all want our children to feel safe, secure and engaged in their lives. But when big, bad things happen in the world- from mass shootings to natural disasters to other tragedies detailed on the news and filtered through the adults at the restaurant, the neighbors on the street, the kids on the bus and friends at school- the world can feel a little less safe and secure for many of our children. How can we reserve our kids feelings of optimism, safety, security, strength and that inexplicable feeling that comes with a carefree childhood when scary things happen across the world, across the state or across the street? For this important topic, we turn a second time to past podcast guest, Dr. Dawn Huebner who you’ll remember from our discussion about worry and anxiety and how to help our kids when they worry too much—a great and helpful podcast episode that I urge you to listen to after this one.
Dr. Dawn Huebner is a Clinical Psychologist and Parent Coach specializing in the treatment of anxiety. She is the author of 9 books for children including the perennial best seller, What to Do When You Worry Too Much, and more recent, Outsmarting Worry. Dr. Huebner's newest book, coming out THIS WEEK called Something Bad Happened, provides support for children learning about big bad things happening the world. Dr. Huebner has been featured on news and information outlets including the TODAY Show, CNN, Parent's Magazine and more. She maintains a private practice in Exeter, NH.
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How to Talk to Kids About Popularity with Mitch Prinstein, Ph.D
3 september 2019 · 30 min
Special guest: Mitch Prinstein, Ph.D Lees meer
Any mention of the word “popular” and many of us are transported to a time when popularity really seemed to matter. Who was on top, who was on bottom and who floated somewhere in the middle of the social hierarchy at school and among peer groups? Who was well-liked by many, who was revered by the masses and who was feared by most- you know, the kids who were popular by default because nobody really wanted to attempt to take on the views and power of that group of kids? Interestingly, popularity in our younger years, according to research, can predict how successful we are in our adulthood—but are we, as parents, supposed to help our children to become more popular, then? Actually, the definition of popularity needs to be fully understood to learn the answer to that- and the strategies and key conversations to help our children will follow. For that, we turn to our guest, Dr. Mitch Prinstein.
Mitch Prinstein, Ph.D. is a husband, a father, board certified in clinical child and adolescent psychology, and serves as the John Van Seters Distinguished Professor of Psychology and Neuroscience, and the Director of Clinical Psychology at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. Mitch’s Peer Relations Lab has been conducting research on popularity and peer relations for almost 20 years—and has produced over 100 scientific works, including a slew of scientific journal articles, book chapters, a set of encyclopedias on adolescent development, and even a textbook on the field of clinical psychology. Mitch is deeply committed to science and training in clinical psychology and his research have been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, National Public Radio, the Los Angeles Times, CNN, U.S. News & World Report, Time magazine, New York magazine, Newsweek, Reuters, Family Circle, Real Simple, and elsewhere. He is also the author of the book; Popular: The Power of Likability in a Status-Obsessed World
The post How to…
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How to Raise Curious, Responsible Toddlers the Montessori Way with Simone Davies
20 augustus 2019 · 43 min
Special guest: Simone Davies,Let’s face it. When people hear the word; “toddler” it often conjures up thoughts of “the terrible twos,” torrential tantrums and tirades that feature the word “NO!” in big capital letters. There are frustrations about toddlers not listening, not eating fruits and vegetables, not sleeping, not listening, not allowing parents to go to go out on a date or go to the bathroom without their company. But what if I told you that by looking at life through a toddler’s eyes and using the methods developed by Dr. Montessori, you can learn the peaceful way of raising a toddler to become a curious, responsible, kind individual? That is exactly what we are going to do today with our next guest. Lees meer
Simone Davies is the author of “The Montessori Toddler”, runs parent-child Montessori classes in Amsterdam at her school Jacaranda Tree Montessori, and is mother of two young adults. She also has a popular blog, “The Montessori Notebook”. Finding Montessori helped her so much when raising her own children and it’s now her passion to help other parents introduce these ideas in their homes too. She was looking to find a way to be with her kids that wasn’t about bossing them about, threatening them and bribing them. Or giving them free reign either. And she wanted them to have a positive experience of school, not just to pass tests, but to love learning.
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How to Talk to Middle Schoolers about What Matters Most with Phyllis Fagell, LCPC
6 augustus 2019 · 57 min
Special guest: Phyllis Fagell, LCPC Middle school is a time of seismic shifts—everything is changing from friendships and relationships to hormones, expectations and not to mention the physical, intellectual, moral, social and emotional growth your child is experiencing in just a short amount of time. Fundamental questions are floating around the heads of adolescents such as “who am I?” “Am I normal?” and “do I fit in?” Middle schoolers are thrust into a changing environment where adult involvement is reduced and their own skills become vital as they figure out exactly what they are going to allow to be their social and personal currency. Skills such as making good friend choices, negotiating conflict, considering other people’s perspectives, cultivating their own passions and recognizing limitations and of course, making responsible, healthy, ethical choices. Yes, there is a lot to this middle school experience that bridges the gap between childhood and teenhood—and thankfully, we don’t need to go it alone. Lees meer
Phyllis L. Fagell, LCPC, is the author of “Middle School Matters,” the counselor at Sheridan School in Washington, D.C., a psychotherapist at The Chrysalis Group and a frequent contributor to The Washington Post and other national publications. She is also a regular columnist for the Association for Middle Level Education and Kappan magazines, and she consults and speaks throughout the country. Phyllis graduated with honors from Dartmouth College, received a master’s degree in journalism from the Medill School at Northwestern University, and earned her master’s degree in counseling from Johns Hopkins University. She tweets @pfagell and blogs at www.phyllisfagell.com
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How to Be a Present Parent with Catherine Weiss
23 juli 2019 · 53 min
Special guest: Catherine Weiss As parents, it is normal to have some stressful thoughts. We might be in conflict with our child and think; “he’s not listening to me,” “she’s so spoiled” or “he’s sucking the life out of me.” But what if we turned these statements on their ear to evaluate their truth but also look inward to see what the actual truth might be? We have the greatest of intentions and love our children—but it is often that we live in the moment. The moment of running from here to there, picking up, dropping off, cooking, cleaning, helping, orchestrating, planning—and getting frustrated, angry or upset when life’s little irritating moments get in our way—our children fighting with us, fighting with each other, not going along with what we deem “the flow.” And I get it—as a mother I am there with you and get this frustration deeply. Today, let’s look into self inquiry so that we can learn to prepare for the long haul rather than the fleeting moment, connection rather than disagreement and love rather than fear. I’ll be going on this journey with you as I am hanging out in the same boat, needing to learn and practice the same lessons and gain the same insights from our next guest who is ready to help us. Lees meer
Catherine Weiss is the author of a radically different parenting book for mothers, currently 5-stars on Amazon, called, The Present Mother: How to Deepen Your Connection With the Present Moment, Yourself, and Your Child. The New York Times bestselling author of The Conscious Parent, Dr. Shefali Tsabary wrote the foreword to The Present Mother and in it says, "Any parent who reads and practices the insights in this book will not only heal their own wounds from childhood, they will change things for their offspring for all generations to come." Catherine's readers call The Present Mother THE parenting book and that it takes Conscious Parenting to the next level.
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How to Raise Teen Girls and Grow a Relationship with Your Teen Daughters with Kari Kampakis
9 juli 2019 · 53 min
Special guest: Kari Kampakis It’s not easy to be a teenage girl. Dealing with cliques, bullying, rejection, and social media fiascos can be overwhelming and disheartening. So yes, being a parent or a key adult in the lives of teen girls can also be a challenge- how do we best advise the teen girls for whom we only want the best when we don’t always know which way is up! Our teen girls are going through so many important changes—physical, emotional, social, cognitive—they are learning what they like, who they like, who they are and who they want to be. This is big stuff. So if you had the opportunity, what would you truly want the teen girls in your life to know? What would you want them to take in about popularity, friendship, relationships, reputation and belief in themselves? As it turns out, we do have the opportunity to talk to our girls about all of these important areas of development and experience—and if we haven’t yet embarked on these discussions, we can start now. Kari Kampakis is a blogger, author, speaker, and columnist from Birmingham. Her two books for teen and tween girls, 10 Ultimate Truths Girls Should Know and Liked: Whose Approval Are You Living For, have been used widely across the country by small groups to empower girls through faith. She is also in the process of writing another book on mothers and daughters. Kari’s work has been featured on The Huffington Post, The TODAY Show along with other national outlets. She and her husband, Harry, have four daughters and a dog named Lola. Learn more by visiting kampakis.com or finding Kari on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, and Twitter. Lees meer
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How to Parent the Danish Way with Jessica Alexander
25 juni 2019 · 1 uur
Special guest: Jessica Alexander. Denmark has been voted as having the happiest people in the world by the OECD (Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development) almost every year since 1973. That’s more than 40 years of happiness! It begs the question—is it the parenting? I mean, is there a Danish Way of parenting? It turns out, there is, and while the Danish Way of parenting is not the only reason Danes are the happiest, it does play a very important role—and the success of it all seems to be tied to the ways they educate children far beyond academics—focusing on play, empathy and social skills. It’s important to delve into it, I hope you would agree, since happy kids tend to grow up to be happy adults who raise happy kids—and the seasons go ‘round and round again. And while in the United States and in other areas of the world, we are seeing an increase of anti-depressants, suicides among young people and mental health diagnoses, as well as a great deal of competition between parents and we have a lot to learn from the Danes. Best-selling Author, Journalist, Danish Parenting Expert & Cultural Researcher, Jessica Alexander’s book "The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know about Raising Confident Capable Kids" has been published in over 25 countries. Her work has been featured in TIME, The Wall Street Journal, Salon, Huffington Post, NPR, NY Times, and many more. She regularly does talks and workshops for parents, schools and organizations like Google, The Women's Network of the United Nations, The World Parenting Forum and many more. She has also worked as a spokesperson for LEGO on the Power of play. Lees meer
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How to Look Beyond Behaviors to Solve Children’s Behavioral Challenges with Mona Delahooke, PhD
18 juni 2019
Special guest: Mona Delahooke, PhD. A kindergartener whose father pinches her on the arm at night- once for every time her teacher wrote the girl’s name on the behavior chart at school that day. Lees meer
A three year old in foster care who was found sitting in a car by the side of the road with his mother, who was passed out at the wheel. His daycare-center teacher sends him to a time out room for challenging behaviors.
A ten year old is diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder. His teachers say he is chronically disruptive, always seeking attention, His problematic behaviors began after his family relocated to a new state.
My next guest says that we are too quick to look at behaviors as attempts to annoy and disrupt—rather than what they truly represent- observable responses to our internal and external experiences. And here’s the problem with that- When we fail to recognize that many behaviors represent the body’s response to stress, not intentional misbehavior, we expend effort on techniques designed to help children logically connect their thoughts, emotions and behaviors and change them—when they simply can’t yet. Instead, we need to see the behavior that is problematic and confusing and NOT ask ourselves how do we get rid of it? But rather, what is this telling us about the child? The answer will then guide us to coming up with the best approach to help that individual child thrive.
Mona Delahooke, Ph.D. is a clinical child psychologist with a passion for supporting families and children. She has worked widely with multidisciplinary teams in the areas of trauma, developmental and emotional differences for 25 years. She is a senior faculty member of the Profectum Foundation and is a trainer and consultant to schools and agencies including the Los Angeles Department of Mental Health. Her blog, The Visible Parent, and book, Social & Emotional Development in Early Intervention (2017) explore the latest translational applications of neuroscience to social and emoti…
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How to Practice Unconditional Parenting Using Love and Reason with Alfie Kohn
11 juni 2019 · 33 min
Special guest: Alfie Kohn. Lees meer
Many parenting books offer countless tips for dealing with kids when they misbehave in the eyes of their parents—refusing to go to bed, rejecting the vegetables they’ve been told to eat, talking back, yelling in the restaurant, badgering their sibling or resisting doing the tasks it takes to get to school on time. But the way parents cope with these challenging behaviors might be backfiring even if they work in the short term. My next guest asks many thought-provoking questions in his book, Unconditional Parenting- but two seem to be at the forefront. First; “What are your long-term objectives for your children?” and second, given those long term goals, which are likely for your child to be some version of a kind, independent, confident, competent, happy and fulfilled person—are the ways in which you are parenting lending themselves to creating that type of person IN the long run—or not? It’s time to take a hard look at some of the parenting practices that have become so common that they are accepted as the acceptable norm- time outs, positive re-enforcement, consequences, withdrawal of attention, punishment—and start taking a hard look at UNCONDITIONAL parenting- a parenting philosophy and practice in which parental love and attention is not in a push-pull relationship with how our children behave. On top of that, UNCONDITIONAL parenting puts to rest the notion that children are trying to make trouble—and instead, assumesthe best of the child and looks at the child as a whole person not a compilation of good and bad behaviors.Alfie Kohn is the author of 14 books on education, parenting, and human behavior, including PUNISHED BY REWARDS (1993), THE SCHOOLS OUR CHILDREN DESERVE (1999), UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING (2005), THE HOMEWORK MYTH (2006), and THE MYTH OF THE SPOILED CHILD (2014). He has appeared twice on “Oprah,” as well as on “The Today Show” and many other TV and radio programs. His articles include: “Five Reasons to Stop Saying ‘Go…