The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}
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392 afleveringen, van nieuw naar oud
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EP 291: Show Me the Science! When your partner (or anyone else!) wants science- not a metaphor
3 november 2026 · 38 min
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals. Lees meer
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) -
EP 290: The Treatment Planning Conversation Every Practitioner Should Have with Parents
27 oktober 2026 · 46 min
I recorded today’s episode just for our practitioners! But parents- you’ll want to listen in, too. Lees meer
I remember how hard it was at the beginning of my career to recommend to a parent that I thought they could use some support, too. I often felt so uncomfortable making that recommendation- I didn’t want parents to feel criticized! - so then I’d really hedge on the why (because the last thing I want is for that parent to feel blamed), and they’d leave confused about what they’re even supposed to be looking for.
And if you’re the parent hearing that recommendation, you’ve probably wondered what it says about you.
In this episode, you will learn:
Why a recommendation for parent work so often feels like blame, and what to tell families from the very first contact so it doesn’t
How treatment planning changes when it starts with a nervous system’s capacity and state instead of the behavior written on the plan
Why the parent’s stress response system belongs in the treatment plan, and why your own reactions to a client do too
Today’s free webinar for practitioners, Working with Parents Who Aren’t On Board, goes deeper into the map, the tools, and where we get our own support. Register, or request the recording if you’re listening later, at robyngobbel.com/freewebinar.
Already know this is how you want to work? Apply at robyngobbel.com/apply.
Parents looking for a practitioner trained in this approach can search robyngobbel.com/directory.
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
The Basics of Attachment (Part 1 of 6) {EP 34} → RobynGobbel.com/basicsofattachment
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/treatmentplan
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immer…
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EP 289: What Parents of Struggling Kids Need from their Support People with Rose LaPiere
20 oktober 2026 · 1 uur 7 min
When life with your kid is this hard, asking for help can take more energy than you have. And the people who love you often don’t know what to do, so they offer advice, or they stay away. Lees meer
This conversation with Rose Lapiere is one you can hand to them (just send the link, no explaining required).
In this episode you will learn:
Why “I have no idea what would help, and I’m here anyway” does more for a struggling parent than any piece of advice
Ways to lighten a family’s load that have nothing to do with parenting, like doing the laundry or sending a text that doesn’t need a reply
What to do when a child gets dysregulated while you’re visiting, and how leaders in faith and community spaces can make room for families who are afraid to come
Hard things are less hard with people who get it. Come find them in The Club.
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/supportpeople
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parent… -
EP 288: How to Stay Regulated...NOT Calm!!!
13 oktober 2026 · 40 min
Sometimes you work so hard to stay ‘calm’ but then realize- it feels totally fake. Lees meer
Yeah, that’s because sometimes calm makes no sense!
Sometimes the behavior is serious, and you are mad, and of course you are.
Regulated doesn’t have to mean calm, and there’s a four-step process that can help you hang onto your owl brain by one sharp talon even while your watchdog is starting to get really active.
In this episode you’ll learn:
Why working to look calm when you aren’t is hard on your nervous system and confusing for your kid (insides and outsides that don’t match are a cue of danger)
The four steps for staying regulated while you’re mad or scared: notice, acknowledge without judgment, self-compassion, and getting grounded in the here and now
The six stages of learning this skill, including the frustrating one where you can see yourself flipping your lid and still can’t stop it, and why that stage is progress
The Club is open for new members through the end of the day today, October 13. Come practice these four steps with us, live, in early November.
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
EP 84: Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior → RobynGobbel.com/changebehavior
Webinar & eBook: Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/regulatednotcalm
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Trai…
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EP 287: How to scaffold "accepting no"
6 oktober 2026 · 47 min
Does hearing “no” or “not right now” or “stop doing…” seem to bring your child’s back-off watchdog or shut-down possum out? Or even worse?? Lees meer
Almost every family I’ve ever worked with has had some sort of struggle with their child tolerating frustration, or disappointment, or not getting what they want.
These kids look ‘spoiled,’ and the judgment from others is REAL.
But accepting no and tolerating frustration are owl brain skills that can be scaffolded. There’s a pretty lengthy ‘skill stack’ underneath accepting no, and if your child doesn’t have a lot of those skills, then of course they are going to go from 0-60 when they don’t get what they want.
In this episode you'll learn:
The skills hiding underneath "accepting no" (regulation, relationship, time, and agency- just to get started with) and why spotting the ones your child is missing changes how you respond
Why "not right now" feels like "never" to a dysregulated brain, even for a kid who understands perfectly well what later means
Why holding the no while your child melts down takes a skill stack of your own, including tolerating other people's judgment
The Club is open for new members this week! Come join us for the full accepting-no skill stack and for help working out what all of this looks like in YOUR family.
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/acceptingno
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts…
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EP 286: A Checklist for BEING, not doing
29 september 2026 · 43 min
I know how intensely we want a checklist. Do this, this, and this, and the dysregulation will end, and your kid will be OK. This episode is the story of chasing exactly that list (Dr. Sears' Attachment Parenting checklist that I worked to check off one by one) and finding something else entirely in Dan Siegel's Parenting From the Inside Out. He didn’t give a checklist at all, just a way of being. Lees meer
So, I can’t give you a checklist, but this episode is the closest thing I can give you: a stance to hold as your foundation, and three relational moves that cycle on top of it, out of order, again and again.
In this episode you will learn:
Why attachment (and regulation, and connection) resist a tidy checklist, and what to reach for instead when the flowchart doesn't exist
The difference between the stance underneath everything (curiosity, compassion, non-judgment, staying with uncertainty) and the three moves that sit on top of it: noticing me, noticing you, noticing we
Why losing the stance in a hard moment doesn't mean anything failed; actually, noticing you've lost it is itself the stance
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Parenting from the Inside Out → drdansiegel.com/book/parentingfromtheinsideout
The Attachment Parenting Book: A Commonsense Guide to Understanding and Nurturing Your Baby
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/being
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for th…
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EP 285: Triggers & Beliefs Only Parenting Seems to Activate
22 september 2026 · 44 min
Sometimes it’s the little moments that overwhelm us more than the big, scary ones. The "whatever" muttered under their breath, the stash of snack wrappers under the bed, or they flatly deny something you're 99% sure they did. Sure, these things are frustrating, and it makes sense you’d have a reaction- but for some reason, you find yourself in zero to fury before you even had a chance to think. Lees meer
It can feel so perplexing. There was no meltdown, no real crisis- why is the reaction oh so big? This episode digs into why…and what those $5-reaction, 50-cent-problem moments are actually pointing to.
In this episode, you will learn:
Why implicit memory isn't just about never forgetting to ride a bike. It's also somatic, relational, and emotional, impacting the reactions we have to all the things that are happening
How old beliefs (mental models) don't just interpret what's happening; they actually predict it and sometimes even help create it
A closer look at the specific mental models - some from parenting, some from being parented - that might be connected to some of your biggest reactions
Curious which of these beliefs might be yours? Chapter 10 of the new Guided Journal walks through the Discovering Our Fears process, with a companion worksheet available as a free download. And if you’re a Club member, you don’t need to go searching for the free download- it’s stored in the Club resource library!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Why Sticky Behaviors Stay Stuck (Part 1 of 3) {EP 268} → RobynGobbel.com/stickybehaviors1
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/parentingtriggers
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about t…
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EP 284: Wherever You Are is Exactly Right (me too)
21 september 2026 · 40 min
I know you are working so, so, so hard to hold onto your owl brain. Lees meer
Maybe you're at the stage where you don't even notice you've flipped your lid until hours later.
Maybe you're at the stage where you can see it happening and still can't stop it.
Either way, there's probably an old, familiar voice telling you that you should be further along than you are by now.
I was once exactly there, too. Hollering- literally - at my own therapist for the reality that I wasn’t changing faster. I was MAD.
I finally finally, finally had to consider believing what she was offering me- that I was exactly where I needed to be in that moment, and I was shifting and changing as fast as I could.
I have had the experience on both sides of the couch- the person who was so angry I wasn’t changing faster AND the therapist who believed with my whole being that my client was exactly where they needed to be- even if that truth was extremely painful.
I wrote the Guided Journal from that space between.
In this episode you will learn:
Why hearing "you're exactly where you need to be" from my own therapist once felt more like a threat than comfort
What made a therapist's steady presence more powerful than any of the tools she had, even all her training in about five bajillion techniques
Why the guided journal was crafted with no agenda, no required order, and nowhere you have to arrive by the last page
The Guided Journal is out today, September 21 — grab it wherever you love to buy books, or catch a signed copy through Schuler Books. Details on tonight's Grand Rapids signing, the Richmond events, and the October 1st online celebration are all at robyngobbel.com.
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/exactlyright
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Be…
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EP 283: What if I'm too burned out to do any of these things?
15 september 2026 · 43 min
Almost always when I’m teaching or presenting, a parent is finally brave enough to ask: “What if I'm too burned out to do any of this?” Lees meer
And then at least half the other parents in the room look expectantly at me because they, too, are wondering how they could possibly conjure up enough energy to use playfulness. They aren’t even sure they like their kid enough to offer enough cues of safety.
This episode looks at the physiology of burn out, why the strategies you already know feel completely out of reach when you're this depleted, and what's actually possible from here.
In this episode, you will learn:
Why it takes a lot more than pushing through burnout to shift out of it
Why rest (not more effort) is the first real step toward healing
How teeny tiny drops of safety, not big sweeping changes, are what actually start tipping the scale back toward connection
If you’re looking for a place to start accumulating cues of safety for yourself, come join us in The Club the next time we are welcoming new members!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Felt Safety (Inside) - Part 1 {EP 161} → RobynGobbel.com/feltsafetyinside
Felt Safety (Outside) - Part 2 {EP 162} → RobynGobbel.com/feltsafetyoutside
Felt Safety (Between) - Part 3 {EP 163} → RobynGobbel.com/feltsafetybetween
Read the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/tooburnedout
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of …
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EP 282: Parents & Practitioners Need the Same Thing- and it's not more tools
8 september 2026 · 46 min
You've called every therapist in town and heard the same thing back: not taking new clients. Or you're the one on the other end of that call, staring at a kid whose behavior you can't make sense of, wondering if you're just not cut out for this. Lees meer
I get it. I intimately understand both sides of this struggle.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why a dysregulated parent needs the same thing from their practitioner that a child needs from their parent
What actually changes behavior long-term (hint: unfortunately, it’s not a tool. That would be this easy!)
Why this nested process — professional, parent, child — is the core framework that makes the Immersion Program unique. And, what makes it work.
Apply for the Immersion Program at RobynGobbel.com/immersion
Find a practitioner who is an Immersion Program Graduate at RobynGobbel.com/Directory
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Apply for the Immersion Program → RobynGobbel.com/immersion
Find a practitioner who is an Immersion Program Graduate → RobynGobbel.com/Directory
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/samething
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on Th… -
EP 281: What I Wanted Every Kid in My Office to Know
1 september 2026 · 39 min
My guiding north star when I was a therapist working with kids (and grown-ups) was always helping them not just get to know their brain and how it works, but actually to develop a relationship with the parts of themselves that seemed to always be getting into trouble. It's not really just brain facts that are helpful to kids. Teaching them about their brain creates the possibility that they can develop a new relationship with their brain- and that’s where the real magic starts to happen. Lees meer
In this episode you'll learn:
Why understanding your kid's brain matters less than helping them build an actual relationship with it — one held by compassion and curiosity instead of judgment
What integration of consciousness and state integration mean, and why flexibility between an owl, watchdog, and possum state (or whatever your family calls them) is the real marker of change
Why modeling this with your own watchdog and possum first gives your kid permission to risk doing the same
I’m teaching a live webinar on how to actually do this with your own kids on September 8 — and if you're already part of The Club, it's included, no extra registration needed.
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Online Training! Teach Kids About Their Owl, Watchdog & Possum Brain! → RobynGobbel.com/TeachKidsTheBrain
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/relationshiptobrain
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list f…
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EP 280: Either You Co-Regulate or You De-Escalate: An Interview with Chrissy D’Agostino
25 augustus 2026 · 58 min
You've probably heard "a dysregulated adult can't co-regulate a child" a hundred times. But if you've ever been stuck in a store with a screaming kid — or a classroom with 17 screaming kids — and zero bandwidth left, you know how useless that advice can feel in the moment. This episode is a conversation with Chrissy D'Agostino, co-author of the new Early Years Guidebook from the Regulated Classroom, about what to do when you're with a dysregulated child, and you're dysregulated too. You’ll hear practical ideas that are actually helpful for a stressed and tapped-out grown-up. Lees meer
In this episode, you will learn:
Why relying so heavily on your voice and your words all day is quietly wearing down your nervous system
The four practices (connectors, activators, settlers, affirmations) that help widen everyone's window of tolerance, at home or in the classroom
Why "meet the moment" is a more useful goal than "manage the outcome"
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
The Regulated Classroom → Regulated Classroom
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/earlyyears
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance o… -
EP 279: Is There a Behavior Intervention Flowchart??
18 augustus 2026 · 43 min
You want the flowchart. Of course you do! If X, then Y would be something to follow when there's no bandwidth left to think it through in the moment. But there isn't a flowchart, and this episode gets into why: stress capacity shifts by the hour, different nervous system states pull different memory networks online, and two nervous systems are shaping each other in real time, not just one. What there is instead is a map. Knowing both how to read it and how to adjust when something unexpected happens is crucial. Lees meer
In this episode you'll learn:
Why a flowchart for dysregulated behavior is neurobiologically impossible
Why the strategy that worked yesterday isn't working today
Why the goal isn't figuring out the exact reason behind a behavior; it's staying curious instead of certain
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Stealing {EP 138} → RobynGobbel.com/stealing
Lying, Stealing, Regression & Baby Talk {EP 222} → RobynGobbel.com/babytalk
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/flowchart
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, con… -
EP 278: So Many Services! How to Prioritize?
11 augustus 2026 · 43 min
OT on Tuesday, a speech eval callback on Wednesday, play therapy on Thursday, a school meeting on Friday that's really just another appointment in disguise. When the calendar starts looking like a second job, the question that actually matters isn't a number — it's whether all of it is moving your family toward regulation, connection, and felt safety, or quietly draining it. This episode walks through how to prioritize when everything's been recommended, and nothing fits, when it's genuinely okay to pause the therapy someone called non-negotiable, and why supporting your own nervous system might be the highest-leverage intervention in the whole house. Lees meer
In this episode you'll learn:
How to tell whether your family's current appointment load is building felt safety or quietly working against it
A framework for prioritizing between recommended therapies when you can't do all of them, including what to weigh beyond which one "sounds" most important
Why pausing or delaying a therapy you've been told is essential isn't neglect
Why your own support sometimes needs to move to the top of the list
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
The Brain Science Behind Your Child's Biggest Behaviors→ RobynGobbel.com/brainseries
A NeuroDevelopmental Approach {EP 47} → RobynGobbel.com/neurodevelopmentalapproach
20 Non-Therapy Therapeutic Interventions → RobynGobbel.com/therapeuticinterventions
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/somanyservices
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join…
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Ep 277: This Kind of Shame Doesn't Heal Alone: A Parent Guest
4 augustus 2026 · 54 min
So many struggling and overwhelmed parents feel like their biggest problems are their kids' behaviors and the chaos that's taking over their family. This week's guest, a longtime Club member, talks about how she slowly came to realize that what she really needed to focus on wasn't strategies to change her kids' behavior, but experiences that would soften the shame she was carrying. Lees meer
This guest bravely shares that her shame didn't soften on her own. It took showing up in community with other parents who were honest about their own mess and who received her without judgment, over and over, before she could start offering herself that same compassion.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why self-compassion is almost impossible to build alone
How this mom's own regulation changed before her kids' behavior did
What it sounds like when your kids start offering that same compassion back to you — and to themselves
Read the full transcript at: URL goes here
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling paren… -
EP 276: Cues of Safety: How to Help when Nothing is Ever Right
28 juli 2026 · 38 min
Every morning (or afternoon or evening) feels like just one long stream of complaints. Breakfast isn’t right, the bowl isn’t right, SOMETHING is always not right, and no matter what gets fixed, it’s never right enough. Lees meer
^That perfectly describes a nervous system stuck in protection mode.
This week’s episode explores how and why nervous systems get stuck and practical ways you can help- even when NOTHING you do seems to help.
In this episode you will learn:
Why your child's reaction is almost never about the thing they're reacting to
What it means for the past to show up as a "tsunami" in the present moment
Three simple places to start dropping in more felt safety today, even before anything else changes
Next month in The Club we’re hosting a workshop so we can all get together, pull out the Grow Your Child’s Owl Brain with Cues of Safety workbook, and make a real plan for how to increase safety in your child’s stream of the NOW - which eventually does calm the tsunami in the stream of the past
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Why Sticky Behaviors Stay Stuck (Part 1 of 3)→ RobynGobbel.com/stickybehaviors1
All Behavior Makes Sense → RobynGobbel.com/allbehaviormakessense
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/cuesofsafety
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.co…
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EP 275: Does Lowering Demands Ever Cause More Stress?
21 juli 2026 · 44 min
Screens. Sugar. Anything that feels really good. The advice to just "lower the demand" can fall really short because for some kids, more access brings real relief. But for others, more access actually causes more stress and we wind up asking kids to take on a responsibility that is beyond their developmental capacity. Lees meer
This episode digs into what's actually generating the stress underneath the behavior, and what it looks like when a kid needs to be held steady instead of shifting our expectations.
In this episode you will learn:
Why high-reward things like screens carry their own built-in stress, and how that changes the question of whether to give more access or less
What it looks like when a kid needs the burden of managing something taken off their shoulders entirely
How to tell if a boundary is actually working: not whether your kid protests, but which direction things are trending over time
If this is landing for you and you want to map this out for your own kid, come join us in The Club. Our resource library and our members will help you map your child’s nervous system, troubleshoot things when they don’t seem to be getting any better, and show you how to take care of yourself in the middle of all of it.
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Enabling vs. Low-Demand Parenting → RobynGobbel.com/enabling
Exploring Low Demand Parenting → RobynGobbel.com/lowdemand
Stress Response System → RobynGobbel.com/stressresponse
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/morestress
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big,…
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EP 274: The Only Three Things You Actually Need to Remember
14 juli 2026 · 48 min
Every behavior. Every parenting moment that feels impossible. It all comes back to three sentences — the three core tenets that distill how relational neuroscience makes sense of behavior and give us a roadmap toward change. Lees meer
This episode lays out the three truths underneath everything I do — this podcast, my books, The Club, the Immersion Program — and why they matter more than any single strategy ever could. Caring for kids with big, baffling behaviors is so overwhelming and confusing. Having an anchor is non-negotiable.
In this episode you'll learn:
The three sentences that hold up this entire framework and sum up what behavior really is
Why Social Baseline Theory says your nervous system was never built to carry hard moments alone
How these three truths can help in the middle of a meltdown — with your kid, with yourself, with anyone you love who's having a hard time
You don't have to hold onto these truths by yourself. That's what The Club is for!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Start Here Podcast: The 6-episode series built to go first → RobynGobbel.com/starthere
Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior — free masterclass + ebook → RobynGobbel.com/masterclass
The Owl/Watchdog/Possum, Stress-Brain-Behavior, and Parent Regulation roadmaps → RobynGobbel.com/downloadroadmaps
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/threethings
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list f…
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EP 273: What this Framework Asks of Helpers
7 juli 2026 · 42 min
You know that kid who just can't stay in the therapy room? They leave, wander around, get into things that aren't theirs, or are maybe even destructive? And three therapists have already called it quits. Lees meer
Maybe this describes your kid. Maybe this describes the kids you work with. This episode is for both of you. The helper who is trying to be with this kid, wondering what they're doing wrong. The helper who is working with a furious or checked-out parent — because it's the same question. But this episode is for the parent of that kid, too.
In this episode you will learn:
Why saying yes to this work means saying yes to dysregulation — kid dysregulation, parent dysregulation, all of it
What it looks like to stay regulated next to someone else's protection mode, whether that's a kid on a windowsill or a parent saying nothing is working
Why a helper- or a parent- can't do this alone; and how being met with regulation yourself is what makes it possible to offer it to someone else.
Come find your people — the ones who get how hard and how worth it this work is.
If you’re a parent or caregiver, join us in The Club at robyngobbel.com/theclub
If you’re a helper and want to be included in my database of professionals trained in my framework, apply for the immersion program at https://RobynGobbel.com/immersion
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Reframing Resistance → https://robyngobbel.com/training/reframing-resistance/RobynGobbel.com/starthere
Immersion Program → RobynGobbel.com/immersion
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/helperframework
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious abo…
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EP 272: Where Do I Even Start? A Brand New Listener's Roadmap
30 juni 2026 · 43 min
When life is overwhelming and your kid's behavior makes no sense — and feels like it's getting worse — even the best resources get hard to use. You're too dysregulated to sort through 270 episodes or an almost 300-page book to figure out where to start. Of course you are. Lees meer
This episode breaks down why you freeze in the face of new information, or end up just begging someone to tell you what to do — plus a personal story about learning that the hard way, and the actual order to work through instead.
In this episode, you’ll learn
Why "I don't even know where to start" is a regulation problem wearing a content problem's clothes
Why more information stopped being the answer at a certain point, and what had to happen instead
The exact order to work through first — and which of three free roadmaps actually matches where you are right now
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Start Here Podcast: The 6-episode series built to go first → RobynGobbel.com/starthere
Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior — free masterclass + ebook → RobynGobbel.com/masterclass
The Owl/Watchdog/Possum, Stress-Brain-Behavior, and Parent Regulation roadmaps → RobynGobbel.com/downloadroadmaps
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/WhereDoIStart
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Imm…
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EP 271: 4 Functions of Behavior, FBAs, and a Nervous System Approach
23 juni 2026 · 48 min
For years, "the four functions of behavior" has been the go-to framework for understanding why kids do what they do: attention, escape, access to tangibles, sensory. It's not wrong, but it's not the whole story either. In this episode, we dig into where this model actually came from, what it leaves out, and what's underneath it once we go looking with a relational neuroscience lens. Lees meer
In this episode, you'll learn:
Where the four functions of behavior actually came from, and why this is relevant
Why naming a behavior's "function" and saying it started in the nervous system aren't competing ideas — they're just two different layers of the same truth
What's actually underneath attention-seeking, escape, tangible-seeking, and sensory behavior - and how to start identifying the missing skill that can be scaffolded
Resources Mentioned on the Podcast
All Behavior Makes Sense ep. 198
When it’s not Working ep 261
The Club (membership community + troubleshooting worksheet)
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/behaviorfunction
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS… -
EP 270: What is Your Kid's Nervous System Predicting? (Part 3 of 3)
16 juni 2026 · 46 min
We've been in a three-part series on sticky behaviors (behaviors that don’t seem to change, no matter WHAT you do!), and today we're doing the detective work: what is your specific child's nervous system actually predicting? Lees meer
In This Episode
Three detective questions to help you identify what prediction might be driving your child's stickiest behaviors, and what those behaviors are actually protecting against
Why you don't have to get the detective work exactly right, because the mismatched experience that changes the brain is almost always the same thing no matter what prediction is running
How your working theory about your child's nervous system changes something in you first, and why this is so important (but also, no pressure. We’re all doing the best we can)
Resources Mentioned
Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors — robyngobbel.com/bafflingbook
The Club — robyngobbel.com/theclub
Immersion Program for Professionals — robyngobbel.com/immersion
Part 1 of this series: Why Sticky Behaviors Stay Stuck
Part 2 of this series: What Actually Changes Sticky Behaviors
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/predicting
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on… -
EP 269: What Actually Changes Sticky Behaviors (Part 2 of 3)
9 juni 2026 · 39 min
Part 1 was about why sticky behaviors stay stuck. Part 2 is where the hope lives. We're diving into the two mechanisms that actually change sticky behaviors at the neurological level. This is the episode that makes the hardest ask of Part - shifting away from ‘fix-it’ and ‘this has to change’ energy- make sense. Lees meer
In this episode you'll learn:
Why your child's dysregulation isn't the obstacle to healing; it's actually the doorway to it
The two mechanisms that change sticky behaviors at the neurological level, why one creates the conditions for the other, and why neither of them will look like anything is working for a long time
What it actually means to stay regulated during your child's hardest moments
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/changesticky
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being W… -
EP 268: Why Sticky Behaviors Stay Stuck (Part 1 of 3)
2 juni 2026 · 49 min
If you've tried everything and a behavior just won't stop…that's a sticky behavior. Let's dive deeeeeep into the neuroscience behind the behaviors that feel impossible to change. We'll touch on how the brain stores predictions and how the most well-meaning response can actually, unintentionally, keep those predictions locked in place and perpetuate that sticky behavior. This is Part 1 of a 3-part series that brings new aha moments to your child's most baffling behaviors. Lees meer
In this episode, you will learn:
Why your child's brain holds onto certain behaviors so tightly, and why it has nothing to do with defiance or choice
What neural glue is and why the behaviors encoded under overwhelm and aloneness are the stickiest of all
Why the urge to make a behavior stop can actually confirm the very prediction the behavior is protecting
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
https://robyngobbel.com/immersion/
Read the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/stickybehaviors1
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for st… -
Ep. 267: Boredom Triggers Dysregulation
26 mei 2026 · 51 min
When kids can't tolerate boredom, it's easy to forget to put on our X-ray vision goggles and chalk it up to too much screen time or even not enough gratitude. Our kids’ reaction to boredom triggers OUR watchdog brain! If we can invite our owl to come back, we will almost certainly see that boredom flips our kids’ nervous system into protection mode. Lees meer
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why boredom can trigger the nervous system to shift onto the protection pathway
How vulnerability in the nervous system (whether from ADHD, autism, trauma, or any other reason a kid has a vulnerable nervous system) impacts a child's experience of boredom
Practical, nervous-system-informed ways to gradually build your child's boredom tolerance
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/boredom
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (form… -
EP 266: When Things Are Genuinely Impossible: One Dad’s Story
22 mei 2026 · 53 min
A dad - who is also a former foster youth and the director of non-profit supporting foster and adoptive families - shares an honest and tender conversation about what it's actually like to parent kids with big, baffling behaviors when life is also impossibly hard. He shares the staggering losses his family has carried over the past few years, how he found The Baffling Behavior Show, Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors, and The Club…and what has genuinely helped him keep going. This one is for every parent who has felt utterly alone in this journey- AND for every professional who needs a reminder of what the real work actually is. Lees meer
In this episode you'll learn:
Why being seen by people who truly get it matters more than any tool or strategy
How learning to receive and offer presence (not just advice) changes the way you show up everywhere- with your kids, at work, and even in a Whataburger drive-through
What it looks like to hold hope and honesty at the same time- staying grounded in how hard things really are without sliding into toxic positivity or despair
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brillian… -
EP 265: Nothing Changed & Everything Changed - A mom interview
19 mei 2026 · 59 min
A single mom who adopted boy-girl twins through foster care shares about her slow, almost invisible journey from survival mode to genuinely delighting in her now-13-year-old kids. Nothing shifted in one big moment. Yet somehow, everything changed. Lees meer
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why the shift from "I have to fix this right now" to "I can just be with you in this" is the thing that changes everything — for your kids and for you
How letting go of performing shame (in school meetings, with professionals, for society) freed up the energy to actually parent
Why the biggest leaps — academic, emotional, social — consistently happened during the stretches when they stopped trying to fix anything and just existed together
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/everythingchanged
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (… -
EP 264: Responding to the Judgement and Advice from Others
12 mei 2026 · 40 min
Parenting kids with big, baffling behaviors is hard enough. THEN someone has opinions about it. This episode breaks down why people say the things they say, what's actually happening in you when judgment lands, and how to respond- or not respond- in a way that protects your own regulation. Lees meer
In this episode:
Why unsolicited advice and criticism are almost always a projection from the other person's protection brain
How to recognize when explaining yourself won't actually help
Practical ways to respond to judgment
Scripts
"Thank you. I'm comfortable with our parenting decisions."
"I hear you. I need to tend to my child right now."
Neutral / Redirect
"We've got it covered, thanks."
"We have a lot of support around this."
"I have people I go to for that."
"That's not something I'm looking for input on."
"We're working with someone on it."
Warmer with a Clear Boundary
"I appreciate that you care. We're good."
"Thanks for thinking of us — we've got support."
Confident / Firmer
"I'm not looking for advice, but thank you."
"That's not actually something I'm open to feedback on."
"We're pretty settled on how we're handling it."
"I'm not going to take that in, but I hear you."
For the chronic offender
"We've talked about this- we're not changing course."
"I've let you know this isn't something I want input on."
The subject-change version
"Mmm. Anyway…" (and move on)
"Noted." (full stop)
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/judgement
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngo…
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EP 263: The Framework That Works on Everyone in the Room
5 mei 2026 · 38 min
Whether you're supporting a dysregulated eight-year-old, a parent who's convinced nothing is working, or the version of yourself driving home after a really hard week, the science is exactly the same. Let’s look at how the theory underneath this podcast, Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors, and the BBTI’s Professional Immersion Program are grounded in the same unified relational neuroscience framework. This paradigm supports your work with kids, parents, and yourself. You only have to learn it once, because it scales! Lees meer
This is the second episode in a row I’ve recorded for professionals and helpers. Next week, we’ll be back with episodes for parents! (Of course, anyone can listen to all of them!)
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why the nervous system framework that explains kids' behavior is the exact same one that explains parents' behavior…and yours
What it actually means to "be the owl" as a professional, and why that is the intervention
Why your reactions to clients aren't failures of professionalism. Their information, and getting curious about them, makes you a better helper
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
All Behavior Makes Sense {EP 198}
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/framework
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me O…
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EP 262: Why Helpers Burn Out- and what to do about it
28 april 2026 · 38 min
The helpers ~ therapists, coaches, teachers, advocates ~ are burning out at alarming rates. We talk endlessly about self-care, caseload management, and having better boundaries but almost nobody is addressing the root cause. Lees meer
This is a special episode that I recorded for all the professionals who listen. All the helpers who show up day after day because they love to help the parents of kids with big, baffling behaviors. All the helpers who are tired and wondering how much longer they can keep doing this.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why working with clients in chronic protection mode pulls helpers into protection mode too - and how that's the real starting point of burnout
Applying the "all behavior makes sense" framework to your own nervous system responses changes everything about how you work
The skill that actually prevents burnout - and why bubble baths and calendar blocking aren't it
And if you want to learn more, you can join 4000+ other professionals and me in Making Sense of Baffling Behaviors- a 4-part free audio training for professionals!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
All Behavior Makes Sense {EP 198}
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/burnout
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my …
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EP 261: When It's Not Working: Troubleshooting
21 april 2026 · 48 min
You've learned about the nervous system, you're trying to co-regulate, you're thinking about felt safety and connection — and the behavior is still happening! WHY?!?! This episode is a troubleshooting guide for exactly that moment. Instead of going back to the drawing board, we're going deeper into the same map: getting curious about regulation, felt safety, connection, and skills to figure out what the nervous system actually needs. Lees meer
In this episode you'll learn:
Why the question is never "what consequence haven't I tried yet?" — and what to ask instead
How to troubleshoot each of the four conditions that need to be in place for behavior to be okay: regulation, felt safety, connection, and skills
Why a child can "know" a skill and still not be able to access it — and what scaffolding that skill actually looks like
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Podcast Episodes
Ep 198: All Behavior Makes Sense — deep dive into the moment the behavioral impulse fires
Ep. 9: Building the Tower of Self Regulation — very early episode about trust and what it means for kids with vulnerable nervous systems; link to go in show notes
Starts at Ep. 161: Felt Safety series — multiple episodes: one on inside, one on outside, one on between
Books
Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors — specifically Chapter 7 (Nat's story); available in paperback, ebook, and audio wherever books are sold; bulk ordering at RobynGobbel.com/Book
Guided Journal for Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors — pre-order available; publishes September 21; signed copies available through her local bookstore
Free Resources
Free Resource Hub — RobynGobbel.com/FreeResourceHub
Making Sense of Baffling Behaviors — free audio training for professionals; May 4–8, 2026; register at RobynGobbel.com/BafflingBehaviors
Paid / Member Resources
The Club resource library — includes the troubleshooting worksheet and the Growing a Child's Owl Brain with Felt Safety packet/workbook (~40 pages) RobynGobbel.com/…
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{REPLAY} Is Co-Regulation Just Coddling??
14 april 2026 · 39 min
This episode originally aired in September 2024. Lees meer
Almost every time I teach, especially if there are folks in the audience not already familiar with my work or the concept of co-regulation, someone asks the very valid question of-
“Isn’t this (co-regulation) just coddling?”
Fair question! There are a lot of underlying assumptions and fears in this question that we will deconstruct in today’s episode.
Spoiler: Co-regulation is NOT coddling!
In this episode, you’ll learn
The difference between co-regulation and coddling
Why asking this question helps us understand some of our fears
What trust has to do with co-regulation
Resources Mentioned on the Podcast
Self-Regulation Doesn’t Exist!!
What Does Co-Regulation Really Look Like? {EP 81}
Enabling vs. Low-Demand Parenting {Ep 144}
Read the transcript at https://robyngobbel.com/coddling
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RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
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Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
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Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Beha… -
EP 260: No Strategy Will Fix This: What Actually Helped Instead
7 april 2026 · 50 min
Listen in on a conversation I have with a Club member whose family lived through years of intense, violent, and deeply isolating behavior…and eventually found their way to something different. It’s a story about holding onto the truth of who your child is, even when everything in front of you makes that feel impossible. Lees meer
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why “just tell me what to do” doesn’t work in the hardest situations, and what actually helps instead
How holding onto your child’s true essence can anchor you, even in the most dysregulated moments
The small, doable shifts that can begin to change things (even before behavior improves)
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/nostrategy
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
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RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) -
EP 259: Holding Hope when your Child's Behavior is Truly Dangerous
31 maart 2026 · 49 min
Parenting a child with big, baffling behaviors can feel terrifying sometimes. Especially when those behaviors aren’t just frustrating… they’re dangerous. In this episode, I’m talking with a parent who knows that reality deeply, and who is also finding a way to hold onto hope. Lees meer
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why seeing your child as “good” doesn’t mean ignoring serious or dangerous behavior
How one parent stays steady even when others say, “This child isn’t worth it.”
What actually helps behavior change (hint: it’s not punishment, but it’s not the absence of accountability either)
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/holdinghope
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
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RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) -
EP 258: Creating a Connected Classroom with Marti Smith & Amie Huggins
24 maart 2026 · 47 min
What if the biggest barrier to learning in the classroom isn’t behavior… but safety? Lees meer
Teachers are overwhelmed. Kids are dysregulated. And somewhere in the middle, everyone is trying their best…but it’s not working the way we hoped. In this conversation, I sit down with occupational therapist Marti Smith and educator Amie Huggins to talk about what happens when we bring relational neuroscience into the classroom in real, practical ways.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why behavior in the classroom makes more sense when we see it as communication, not defiance
How connection, co-regulation, and felt safety actually support learning (not compete with it)
Simple, realistic ways teachers can meet sensory and relational needs—even with a full classroom
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
GET - The Connected Therapist
GET -Creating a Connected Classroom
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/connectedclassroom
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersi… -
EP 257: One Reason why Kids Melt Down after School
17 maart 2026 · 44 min
When your kid melts down after school, it seems like they just have a bad attitude or don’t want to do homework. But sometimes those explosions have less to do with behavior and more to do with a nervous system that has been working hard to handle sensory stress all day long. Lees meer
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why do many kids fall apart after school, even if they seemed “fine” all day
How the sensory environment at school can slowly chip away at a child’s regulation
Why after-school meltdowns often happen with the people kids feel safest with
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
RobynGobbel.com/freeresourcehub
Robyngobbel.com/sensorywebinar
Read the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/meltdownafterschool
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) -
EP 256: When Behavior Feels Personal, It Might Actually Be Sensory
10 maart 2026 · 41 min
Have you ever had one of those moments where your child completely loses it over the wrong cup, a sibling getting too close, or one tiny thing at the end of the day? It can feel like they are actually mad at you- or their sibling. But actually, rude, defiant, or shutdown behavior might actually have a lot more to do with sensory overwhelm and a nervous system that’s simply run out of capacity and almost NOTHING to do with how mad they are because you gave them the wrong cup. Lees meer
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why behaviors like sass, sibling aggression, and “you never listen!” can look relational but actually begin with sensory stress in the body
How everyday sensory input like noise, lights, smells, textures, movement, and school environments can chip away at your child’s window of tolerance?
Why noticing your child’s sensory world can help you respond with more clarity, less personalization, and more support for regulation
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
When Parenting Triggers Your Own Trauma Part 1 of 6 {EP 250}
Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior {EP 84}
Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior webinar & eBook
Read the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/traumashapednervoussystem
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Fa… -
EP 255: Grieving as a Parent with a History of Trauma: Part 6 of 6
3 maart 2026 · 45 min
The Grief No One Talks About in Trauma-Informed Parenting Lees meer
Sometimes the hardest part of parenting isn’t your child’s behavior, it’s the grief that rises up inside you. The grief of not getting what you needed. The grief of still healing while you’re trying to parent intentionally. In this episode, we talk about the quiet, complicated grief that can come with parenting a child with a vulnerable nervous system when you have your own history of trauma.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
The core griefs that often emerge when you’re parenting with your own trauma history
Why noticing intergenerational patterns can stir shame
How to be with your grief using self-compassion and a gentle “touch in, touch out” approach
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Podcast - Start Here!
When Parenting Triggers Your Own Trauma: Part 1 of 6 {Ep 250}
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/grieftraumahistory
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Trainin… -
{RERECORD} But....What about a Consequence?!
27 februari 2026 · 48 min
This episode is an update and re-record of episode 56 Lees meer
Consequences. Punishments. Limits. Boundaries.
These words don't mean the same thing but we often use them interchangeably.
In this episode, we get clear on what exactly is a consequence versus a punishment versus a boundary.
And how parenting through the lens of regulation, connection, and felt-safety is absolutely not boundary-less or permissive parenting.
It's a way of looking at our kids and asking "What does my child need for their success to be inevitable?" and then giving them that.
It definitely isn't about making sure our kids are always happy or never frustrated or we always say yes.
It's about changing the lens on how we view their expressions of emotions and behaviors.
And yes- it's about setting boundaries that keep our kids safe and help their brains develop the internalized co-regulation (self-regulation!) they need!
Read a summary of this episode and access the full show notes at: RobynGobbel.com/WhatAboutAConsequence
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
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Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, c… -
EP 254: Identifying Your Triggers as a Parent with a History of Trauma: Part 5 of 6
24 februari 2026 · 49 min
If you’re parenting a child with a vulnerable nervous system when you have your own history of trauma, you know that sometimes your reaction isn’t really about what’s happening in front of you; it’s about what’s happened before. In this episode, we’re talking about how to gently uncover what might be going on when you have a huge stress response to a stressor that didn’t quite need an attack-level watchdog response. Lees meer
In this episode, you’ll learn:
What a trigger actually is (and why it doesn’t feel like one in the moment)
How to tell if your nervous system is reacting to now… or something older
A simple step-by-step process to uncover and care for the belief driving your reaction
If you’re ready to go deeper into this work, the full Trigger Hunting masterclass is inside The Club.
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Trauma, Memory, & Behavior: Part 1 {EP 90}
What a Trigger REALLY Is {EP 223}
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/parenttraumatriggers
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for… -
{RERECORD} The Stress Response System
20 februari 2026 · 44 min
This is a re-record of a foundation episode, episode 94 Lees meer
The Stress Response System plays a huge role in our children's behaviors and also how we perceive those behaviors.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
What stress is and how to differentiate good stress from bad stress
The impact of trauma and toxic stress to the Stress Response System
How to build resilience in a sensitized Stress Response System
A reframe to shift your own Stress Response System
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) -
EP 253: Caring for your Own Watchdog and Possum as a Parent with a History of Trauma: Part 4 of 6
17 februari 2026 · 41 min
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, nervous system activation, and protective responses such as shutdown, dissociation, anger, and urgency. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening. Lees meer
If you have a history of trauma, your watchdog and possum parts have likely been working hard for a long time. And when you’re parenting a child with big baffling behaviors, those protectors can get loud.
In this episode, we draw inspiration from Dan Siegel’s work to explore what it means to be with your watchdog and possum without becoming them. This isn’t about silencing your protectors. It’s about building a relationship with them.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
How state integration allows you to notice your watchdog and possum parts without fusing with them
Why curiosity and compassion widen your window of tolerance more effectively than control or self-criticism
How caring for your protective parts begins with awareness, gratitude, and understanding what they need
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Free Resources Hub!
Robyngobbel.com/webinar
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/caringforyourown
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
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InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus o… -
{RERECORD} Connection or Protection
12 februari 2026 · 55 min
This is a re-record of a foundation episode, episode 7 Lees meer
The brain has two modes- connection or protection.
Protective behaviors include opposition, defiance, aggression- basically, any behavior that doesn't invite connection.
If we want to help shift our children's oppositional behaviors, we must first help their brain shift out of protection and into protection!
You can read more on my blog: robyngobbel.com/connectionorprotection/
Resources mentioned on the podcast:
Match the Energy Not the Dysregulation ep 155
Felt Safety Series- starts at ep 161
Boundaries Series starts at ep 111
Oppositional Behavior Series starts at 156
All Behavior Makes Sense ep 198
Focus on the Nervous System webinar
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) -
EP 252: Nurturing Your Window of Tolerance as a Parent with a History of Trauma Part 3 of 6
10 februari 2026 · 44 min
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, parenting stress, nervous system activation, and self-compassion. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening. Lees meer
Parenting a child with a vulnerable nervous system can stretch your capacity in profound ways, especially when you have a history of trauma yourself. In this episode, we explore what it really means to nurture your window of tolerance, not through force or self-discipline, but through safety, connection, and compassion. This episode is about strengthening your own stress response system, not by pushing harder, but by offering your nervous system the conditions it needs to feel safe.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why widening your window of tolerance after trauma has to be gentle, relational, and slow
How self-compassion functions as a powerful intervention to support your own nervous system
Practical, realistic ways to nurture your window of tolerance through connection, repair, honoring limits, and micro-cues of safety
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Free Resources Hub!
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/ParentWindowOfTolerance
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
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Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
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Webinar and eBook on Focus on the… -
{BONUS} Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior- webinar replay
6 februari 2026 · 1 uur 10 min
On February 3, I taught a live webinar online- Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior. Lees meer
This is the audio-only version of that webinar!
To watch the full video webinar and to download the accompanying resources, head to RobynGobbel.com/webinar
In this webinar, you'll learn
the three core tenets that underlie behavior change
what behavior really is
how regulation, connection, and felt safety are related to behavior
how the nervous system responds to stress
why baffling behaviors are due to a sensitized stress response system
how attachment or developmental trauma leads to baffling behaviors
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With) -
EP 251: Your Trauma Shaped Nervous System Makes Sense Part 2 of 6
3 februari 2026 · 51 min
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, parenting stress, and nervous system activation. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening. Lees meer
If you’ve spent years learning about the nervous system to better support your child, and now you’re ready to offer the same curiosity and compassion to yourself, then this episode is for you.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
How core nervous system concepts like connection vs. protection, regulation, and felt safety apply to your trauma-shaped nervous system
Why reactions rooted in watchdog and possum states make sense for you, too
How sensitized stress responses, state-dependent functioning, and a narrowed window of tolerance explain why insight alone isn’t enough
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
When Parenting Triggers Your Own Trauma Part 1 of 6 {EP 250}
Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior {EP 84}
Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior webinar & eBook
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/TraumaShapedNervousSystem
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
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LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources… -
{RE-RECORD} EP 15: Lying as a Trauma Driven Behavior
30 januari 2026 · 53 min
This episode originally aired in 2020. It's a very popular episode that deserved being updated because so many folks are still listening! Lees meer
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Lying is probably the behavior parents seek support with the most. It's confusing. It's triggering. It's exhausting.
We can use our x-ray vision goggles to get underneath the lying so we can respond in ways that actually sets the boundary and increases the possibility of helping our children developing more socially and relationally appropriate behaviors.
Would you rather about Lying as a Trauma Driven Behavior? Check out my blog! https://robyngobbel.com/lying/
Additional Resources:
Lying as a Trauma Driven Behavior Infographic
Free Resource Hub: RobynGobbel.com/FreeResourceHub
Ep 222: Lying, Stealing, Regression and Baby Talk
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (forme… -
EP 250: When Parenting Triggers your Own Trauma Part 1 of 6
27 januari 2026 · 45 min
Content note: This episode discusses trauma, parenting stress, and nervous system overwhelm. There are no graphic details, but please take care while listening. Lees meer
Parenting a child with a vulnerable nervous system can stir up your own trauma in ways that feel surprising, intense, and deeply unsettling. In this episode, we slow everything down and make sense of why this kind of parenting can feel so much harder when you have your own trauma history.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why parenting a dysregulated child uniquely activates trauma for caregivers
How attachment, memory networks, and a narrowed window of tolerance collide in everyday parenting moments
Why understanding your nervous system is just as important as understanding your child’s
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
When Parenting is Traumatic Ep 95
Trauma, Memory, and Behavior Ep. 91 (implicit memory)
Free Resource Hub
Read the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/whenparentingtriggersyourtrauma
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation … -
EP 249: Behaviors as Brilliant Adaptations with Sally Maslansky
20 januari 2026 · 1 uur 2 min
Content warning: This episode includes discussion of severe trauma, abuse (including sexual abuse), dissociation, and suicidal ideation. Please take care while listening and pause if needed. Lees meer
In today’s episode, Robyn is joined by therapist, author, and adoptive parent Sally Maslansky to explore dissociative identity disorder through the lens of interpersonal neurobiology, attachment, and compassion. Together, they unpack how even the most confusing and baffling behaviors- ours and our children’s - can be understood as brilliant adaptations rooted in survival.
In this episode, you’ll hear about:
Why dissociative identity disorder can be understood as a brilliant adaptation to overwhelming early trauma
How making sense of our own histories (especially implicit memory and attachment wounds) changes the way we parent and repair ruptures with our kids.
What it looks like, in real life, to heal through connection, compassion, and feeling truly felt- and how these experiences invite our attachment systems to move toward security
Resources Mentioned on the Podcast
A Brilliant Adaptation by Sally Maslansky
Virtual event with Sally Maslansky hosted by GAINS on January 21
Sally Maslansky, LMFT with Daniel J. Siegel, MD- UCLA Friends of Semel Institute on March 11
Psychotherapy Networker Symposium- Live in Washington D.C. & Online March 19-21
Read the full transcript at: https://RobynGobbel.com/brilliantadaptations
:::
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for …
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EP 248: Felt Safety when Nothing Feels Safe
13 januari 2026 · 36 min
Should we be talking about felt safety when so much is genuinely unsafe? Lees meer
I’ve been thinking a lot about this hard and honest question that so many parents are holding: when danger, injustice, and unmet needs are real and ongoing, does focusing on felt safety miss the point? Or can it actually be part of resistance, coherence, and long-term protection for our nervous systems?
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why focusing on felt safety is not the same as ignoring real danger, injustice, or systemic failure- and how both truths can coexist
How strengthening the nervous system can reduce long-term harm without minimizing how hard, unfair, or traumatic things are
Why regulation and moments of safety, connection, and coherence are not toxic positivity- but a necessary foundation for advocacy, boundaries, and resilience
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Creating Felt Safety LIVE webinar with Robyn on Thursday January 15th RobynGobbel.com/FeltSafetyWebinar
The Club! RobynGobbel.com/TheClub
Read the full transcript at: https://robyngobbel.com/nothingfeelssafe
We can't wait to review your application for the BBTI's Immersion Program for Professionals.
Go now to RobynGobbel.com/apply .
Applications are already streaming in and registration is starting to fill up!
We are waiting to read your application for the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals!
RobynGobbel.com/immersion for every detail about the program you could be curious about!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
InstagramOver on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of…