Thriving Kids

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1. Q&A: How to Help an Anxious Child Without Making Anxiety Worse

   29 oktober 2026 · 44 min

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   Every child worries sometimes, but how can parents tell when it has become something more? In this Q&A episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson is joined by Dr. Theresa Welles, Shapiro Family Director of the Bubrick Center for Pediatric OCD at the Child Mind Institute, to answer listener questions about anxiety in children and teens. Dr. Welles explains why anxiety is a normal and even helpful emotion. She also covers signs that a child’s anxiety has become a problem, like when their world gets smaller because they're avoiding school, friends, or activities they used to enjoy. Lees meer

   In this episode, Dr. Dave and Dr. Welles cover:

   · How to tell the difference between normal worries and an anxiety disorder

   · Less obvious signs of anxiety in teens, including anger, procrastination, and saying they "don't care"

   · Why stomachaches and headaches before school can be signs of anxiety, and how to respond

   · How to help a child who avoids activities because they're afraid of failing, without pushing too hard

   · How to help an anxious child without accidentally reinforcing their anxiety

   · When to seek professional help, including when family routines start to revolve around a child's anxiety

   · What good treatment for child and teen anxiety looks like, and signs that it isn't working

   · How OCD differs from anxiety, and how exposure and response prevention (ERP) helps kids break the cycle

   Further Reading

   · How Anxiety Affects Teenagers

   · Anxious Stomachaches and Headaches

   · What to Do (and Not Do) When Children Are Anxious

   · What Does OCD Look Like in Kids?

2. Motivation, Persistence, and Learning

   22 oktober 2026 · 42 min

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   Why do some kids keep trying when something is difficult while others quickly give up? In this episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson sits down with Yale University researcher Dr. Julia Leonard to explore the science of motivation, persistence, and learning — and the important role parents and other adults can play in helping kids decide which challenges are worth pursuing. Lees meer

   In this episode, they cover:

   • How children develop beliefs about what they’re capable of
   • Why stepping in too quickly can unintentionally discourage independence
   • How modeling your own hard work can help kids learn to keep trying
   • Why giving kids opportunities to struggle and improve can build confidence
   Key takeaways

   • Kids learn about effort through relationships. When children face a difficult task, they look to parents, teachers, and other adults for clues about whether the challenge is worth pursuing and whether they’re capable of succeeding.

   • Resist the urge to immediately take over. When a task is developmentally appropriate, giving kids room to try, struggle, and problem-solve can help them build independence and confidence.

   • Let kids see your hard work. Adults often make everyday tasks look effortless, while doing their own difficult work out of sight. Showing kids that adults struggle, practice, make mistakes, and eventually improve helps make effort visible.

   • Praise the process, not just the person. With younger children, highlighting effort, strategies, persistence, and progress can be more motivating than simply telling them they’re smart, talented, or “the best.”

   • Keep praise authentic. Over-the-top praise can backfire, and as kids get older, they become increasingly sensitive to praise that doesn’t match their own assessment of how they performed.

   • Create opportunities for kids to improve. Whether at home or in school, feedback, second chances, and opportunities to revise work send kids the message that learning is a process — not a single judgment of their a…

3. Q&A: When Kids Don’t Want to Go to School: Anxiety, Avoidance, and Refusal

   15 oktober 2026 · 30 min

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   When a child refuses to go to school, it can be easy to assume they’re unmotivated, being defiant, or simply trying to skip class. But school avoidance is often driven by anxiety — and understanding what’s behind it is an important first step toward helping kids get back to school. Lees meer

   In this Q&A episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson is joined by Alana Cooperman, LCSW, a senior social worker in the Anxiety Disorders Center at the Child Mind Institute, to answer parents’ questions about school anxiety, avoidance, and refusal.

   Cooperman explains how school avoidance can look different across ages, from crying and clinging to parents in younger children to stomachaches, sleep problems, irritability, frequent trips to the nurse, or repeated requests to come home in older kids and teens. She and Dr. Dave also discuss how ADHD, learning difficulties, autism, peer problems, academic pressure, and embarrassing experiences at school can contribute to avoidance.

   In this episode, they cover:

   • Common reasons kids may avoid school
   • How bullying, peer conflict, tests, teachers, bathrooms, and lunchrooms can become triggers
   • How ADHD, executive functioning challenges, learning disorders, and autism can contribute
   • How to validate anxiety without validating avoidance
   • Why staying home shouldn’t become more rewarding than going to school
   • How gradual exposure can help kids build tolerance for anxiety
   • When professional help may be needed
   • Why progress isn’t always linear — and why effort matters

   Further reading

   When Kids Refuse to Go to School

   How Anxiety Affects Kids in School

   Anxious Stomachaches and Headaches

   Have a question you’d like Dr. Dave and a Child Mind Institute expert to answer in a future episode? Send it through the Child Mind Institute’s social channels or email podcast@childmind.org.

4. Getting Sober Young: Molly Jong-Fast on Addiction and Recovery

   8 oktober 2026 · 45 min

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   Journalist, author, and podcast host Molly Jong-Fast got sober at 19 — and nearly three decades later, she continues to speak candidly about her experience with alcoholism and recovery. In this episode of Thriving Kids, she joins Dr. Dave Anderson for a conversation about recognizing addiction in adolescence, overcoming stigma, and why young people struggling with substance use need to know that recovery is possible. Lees meer

   In this episode, they cover:

   • Why addiction can look different from typical adolescent experimentation
   • Why family history can be an important part of conversations about substance use
   • How parents can talk openly with kids about addiction without relying on shame
   • What parents should know about marijuana and the developing adolescent brain
   • Why lasting recovery involves more than simply removing access to a substance
   • How schools and colleges can better support young people who choose sobriety
   Key takeaways

   • Addiction can begin early. Jong-Fast describes recognizing during adolescence that she had difficulty controlling her substance use and that her experience looked different from that of many of her peers.

   • Pay attention to patterns, not just individual incidents. Repeated inability to stop, dramatic changes in behavior, escalating use, or repeatedly trying and failing to cut back may signal that a young person needs additional support.

   • Talk honestly about family history. When addiction runs in a family, age-appropriate conversations can help kids understand that they may have increased vulnerability without framing their future as inevitable.

   • Shame isn’t treatment. Families can establish clear boundaries around substance use while continuing to communicate love, connection, and a willingness to help.

   • Legal doesn’t mean harmless. Alcohol and marijuana may be legal for adults, but that doesn’t eliminate the potential risks associated with adolescent use.

   • Young people need spaces that support sobriety. Substance-free housing, …

5. Q&A: How to Handle Attention & Focus Issues

   1 oktober 2026 · 32 min

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   Attention problems can be frustrating for kids and parents. In this Q&A episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson answers nine parent questions about attention and focus, including when difficulties may point to ADHD. Lees meer

   Dr. Dave explains why ADHD can make boring or repetitive tasks especially difficult and shares practical strategies for strengthening study, organization, and attention skills.

   In this episode, Dr. Dave covers:
   • How to distinguish attention problems from lack of motivation
   • Strategies for kids with attention difficulties
   • How phones, gaming, and social media may affect attention
   • Why ADHD can look different in girls and boys
   • Helping kids start homework & stay focused
   • When to seek a professional ADHD evaluation

   Key takeaways

   • ADHD is not simply a lack of effort. Kids may struggle most with tasks that feel boring.
   • Attention problems don’t always mean ADHD. Anxiety, depression, trauma, learning disorders and other factors can also affect focus.
   • ADHD strategies can help even without a diagnosis. Routines, reinforcement and organization systems can make tasks easier.
   • Planners, calendars, distraction-free workspaces, technology impacts and more.
   Further reading

   How to Get an ADHD Diagnosis

   How to Tell if Your Daughter Has ADHD

   How Girls With ADHD Are Different

   How to Help Yourself Get Organized

   Side Effects of ADHD Medication
   Not All Attention Problems Are ADHD

   Books mentioned in the episode

   All About ADHD: The Complete Practical Guide for Classroom Teachers — Linda J. Pfiffner

   Taking Charge of ADHD: The Complete, Authoritative Guide for Parents — Russell A. Barkley

   Managing ADHD in School — Russell A. Barkley

   The Everyday Parenting Toolkit — Dr. Alan E. Kazdin

   Organizational Skills Training for Children with ADHD: An Empirically Supported Treatment — Richard Gallagher, Howard B. Abikoff, and Elana G. Spira

   Additional Resources

   ADDitude

   CHADD

6. What to Know About Teen Substance Use

   24 september 2026 · 59 min

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   Experimenting with alcohol, marijuana, tobacco, and other substances isn’t uncommon during adolescence — but that doesn’t mean that parents don’t, or shouldn’t, have concerns about it. On this episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson is joined by two experts from Partnerships to End Addiction, clinical psychologist Dr. Aaron Hogue and licensed clinical social worker Molly Bobek, for a practical conversation about preventing teen substance use, recognizing the warning signs of substance use problem, and helping young people make safer decisions. Lees meer

   They explain why the relationship parents build with their kids may be one of their most powerful prevention tools. And they discuss how to talk about drugs and alcohol without exaggerating the risks or losing credibility, what parents should know about the connection between substance use and mental health, and how to respond when a teenager comes home after drinking or doing drugs. They also offer guidance on when to seek treatment, what effective treatment should look like, and why it’s important for families to be involved in the recovery process.

   In this episode, they cover:

   • How to distinguish typical experimentation from more concerning patterns of substance use
   • Why mental health challenges can make teens more vulnerable to misusing substances
   • How parents can balance family values, consequences, safety, and open communication

   Key takeaways

   • Relationships are a powerful prevention tool. Staying calm, curious, and connected — Dr. Hogue’s “three C’s” — can offer teens somewhere to turn when they encounter substances or difficult situations.

   • Don’t feel like you have to exaggerate the risks of substances to be heard. Scare tactics can backfire, undermining parents’ credibility. Accurate, age-appropriate information can help teens understand real risks while preserving trust.

   • Think in terms of many small conversations, as opposed to one “big talk” about drinking and drugs. You can create an ongoing dialo…

7. Q&A: Anger, ADHD, Lying, OCD, and Big Feelings

   17 september 2026 · 40 min

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   In this Q&A episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson answers eight parent questions about some of the most common — and challenging — behaviors families face. From aggression and ADHD to lying, motivation, OCD, and big emotions, Dr. Dave explains what may drive these behaviors and offers practical, evidence-based strategies parents can use to respond. Lees meer

   In this episode, Dr. Dave covers:

   • Why is my three-year-old so angry and aggressive?
   • How can I help a child with ADHD without medication?
   • My child is out of control. Where can I send him?
   • How do I motivate a “lazy” child?
   • How do I explain OCD to a child?
   • Why does my child lie about everything?
   • Why won’t my child listen unless I yell?
   • Why is my child so sensitive?

   Key takeaways

   • Anger and aggression in young children can stem from temperament, development, family stress, and other factors. Behavioral parent training can help parents combine warmth with clear expectations and consistent consequences.

   • Medication is not the only evidence-based ADHD treatment. Parent training, classroom support, organizational skills, and help with peer relationships can all be effective but require consistent adult involvement.

   • Even when behavior feels out of control, behavioral and family interventions can help. Families may also consider school-based services, therapeutic programs, residential treatment, or hospitalization when safety is a concern.

   • What looks like “laziness” may reflect depression, ADHD, learning challenges, or other difficulties. Parents can build motivation through meaningful rewards and opportunities for success.

   • OCD involves intrusive thoughts and/or repetitive behaviors a person feels driven to perform. Treatment, including exposure and response prevention (ERP), can help kids tolerate anxiety without compulsions.

   • Lying is common in childhood. Parents can emphasize honesty, reinforce truth-telling — especially when it’s difficult — and use calm, proportionate consequences when …

8. Dad Brain: Fatherhood, Parenting, and the Brain

   10 september 2026 · 47 min

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   Becoming a father doesn’t just change your life, research suggests it can actually change your brain. In this episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson sits down with psychologist and researcher Dr. Darby Saxbe, author of Dad Brain: The New Science of Fatherhood and How It Shapes Men’s Lives, to explore the emerging science of what happens to men’s brains, hormones, relationships, and sense of identity when they become fathers. Lees meer

   Dr. Saxbe explains why some of the brain changes associated with fatherhood may help dads become more attuned to their children, how testosterone levels can shift as men move into caregiving roles, and why becoming a parent can bring both psychological vulnerability and long-term neurological benefits. They also discuss paternal mental health, loneliness, and social connection among men, the pressures created by online messages about masculinity, and how being an engaged father can offer men a powerful source of connection and purpose.

   In this episode, they cover:

   • How men’s brains can change during the transition to fatherhood
   • Why some brain changes may help fathers become more responsive to their babies
   • What researchers are learning about paternal postpartum depression and anxiety
   • Why the popular idea that “higher testosterone is always better” misses what the research actually shows
   • How relationships and social connection contribute to men’s long-term health
   • How fatherhood can encourage healthier behaviors in men

   Key takeaways

   • Fathers’ brains change, too. Research suggests that becoming a father is associated with changes in brain structure and function, including areas involved in understanding and responding to other people’s thoughts and emotions.

   • Those changes can bring both opportunity and vulnerability. In Dr. Saxbe’s research, some of the brain changes associated with stronger bonding and greater caregiving involvement were also associated with more symptoms of anxiety, depression, psychological distress, and…

9. Q&A: Friendship, Neurodiversity, and Staying True to Yourself

   3 september 2026 · 33 min

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   In this Q&A episode of Thriving Kids, Dr. Dave Anderson answers listener questions inspired by last week’s conversation with Caroline Maguire about friendship, neurodivergence, masking, and building authentic relationships. Lees meer

   Dr. Dave discusses how parents can help kids make friends without making them feel like they have to change who they are, how to understand the difference between practicing social skills and masking, and how to support kids who over-apologize, over-explain, or spiral after awkward social moments. He also offer advice on navigating social anxiety, loneliness, and friendship expectations — and talks about how adults can model healthier friendship habits for kids.

   This episode offers practical, compassionate guidance for helping children build meaningful connections, tolerate the ups and downs of friendship, and find relationships where they feel accepted for who they really are.

   In this episode, Dr. Dave covers:

   How to help kids make friends without pressuring them to change who they are

   Why one awkward moment does not mean a friendship is ruined

   What to do when kids say they “don’t need friends”

   How to help kids who move too quickly from meeting someone to “best friend”

   How adults can model boundaries, repair, and healthier friendship habits

   Further Reading

   How to Help Kids Who Are Lonely

   Helping Young Children Who Are Socially Anxious

   How to Help Kids Who Are Too Hard on Themselves

   Caroline Maguire

   Why Will No One Will Play With Me

10. Summer Hot Takes: Parenting Advice With Dr. Aliza Pressman

    27 augustus 2026 · 49 min

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    From gentle parenting to strict rules about screen time, today’s parents are constantly bombarded with advice about the “right” way to raise their kids. But how much of that advice is actually supported by research? Lees meer

    In this special Summer Hot Takes episode, Dr. Dave Anderson sits down with developmental psychologist, bestselling author, and Raising Good Humans podcast host Dr. Aliza Pressman to explore some of parenting’s most talked-about topics. Together, they discuss why it’s important for any approach to be rooted in science, how authoritative parenting (not to be confused with the harder-to-define gentle parenting) balances warmth with boundaries, and how families can develop healthier relationships with technology.

    They also talk about the importance of letting kids experience disappointment, navigate failure, and learn from difficult emotions without treating every feeling like an emergency. Throughout the conversation, Dr. Dave and Dr. Pressman remind parents that thoughtful, flexible parenting is the goal, not perfection.

    In this episode, they cover:

    What people often mean when they talk about “gentle parenting” and common misunderstandings about the term

    What authoritative parenting is and why it remains one of the most evidence-supported parenting approaches

    Practical ways to create healthier screen habits for children and teens

    Why boredom, waiting, and feeling lonely sometimes can help kids build resilience and independence

    How to help kids tolerate disappointment, failure, and rejection

    Key takeaways

    Healthy screen habits focus on balance, connection, and intentional use.

    Kids benefit from experiencing age-appropriate disappointment and failure.

    Parents don’t need to solve every emotion immediately to support emotional health.

    Parenting trends come and go, but warmth combined with clear boundaries remains the most effective approach.

    Further reading from the Child Mind Institute

    · Helping Kids With Flexible Thinking

    · Three Common Pare…

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